VIDEOS: Robber splits after storekeeper hits him with bananas

This is not a promo for CBC's egregiously unfunny sitcom Kim's Convenience. This is real footage of an attempted robbery which occurred Saturday evening at a convenience store in Mississauga ON. The holdup was foiled when the wife of the storeowner -- a Korean, surprisingly enough -- hit the would-be thief -- possibly white, possibly not -- with a bunch of bananas, forcing him to flee.

CTV's Nick Dixon [Really? Not "Dick" Dixon? Ed.] has the story.



The storeowners were unhurt. The would-be thief may, like the bananas, have a couple of bruises. Inspector Knacker of the Peel Police [not making this up. Ed.] said the intruder did not have a gun, but warned retail workers not to confront suspects as, you never know, they could be armed with a gun... or maybe a banana of their own. What do you do then?! John Cleese and the Monty Python group demonstrate the proper technique for dealing with such a situation.

Protests over death of an "innocent" black youth continue

Walt presents, without much further comment, a video clip from CBC News, showing how serious the "black community" is in its demand for "justice" in the shooting of Michael Brown.

Note from Ed.: You'll have to take my word for it, there really was a video showing black yoofs boogyin' down the street doing the "hands up, don't shoot" dance. What a great sense of rhythm they have! But the video seems to have disappeared from the politically correct CBC News website. It's "unavailable" now. But here's the rest of this morning's news from Ferguson.

While the party continues, Ferguson Police Chief Tom Jackson identified Darren Wilson as the shooter. Chief Jackson said Officer Wilson -- a six-year veteran of the force -- was called, along with other officers, the area after a 911 call reporting a "strong-arm robbery" at a nearby convenience store. Apparently a couple of yoofs of the coloured persuasion grabbed a box of cigars. It is not known whether any cigars were found on the body of Michael Brown.

UPDATE - UPDATE - UPDATE: The Ferguson Police Department has just released a montage of stills from surveillance video shot at the convenience store on August 9th. And what do we see here? A large black boy behaving badly towards a smaller shopkeeper who appears to be Asian. Do the stereotypes never end? Can't see the box of cigars. And is the large boy not just black but Brown? Even if he is, executing him seems a little severe. After all, scenes like this occur 100s of times every day, right across Armerica.

Hitting the jackpot in Vegas

Channel 8 in Las Vegas reports the news. Like a robbery at a convenience store. Not exactly news, you say? Well, it's not so much the fact that a convenience store was relieved of quantity of beer and junk food, as the way in which it all went down.

There wasn't just one thief, or two, or even three, but dozens! That's right. Even though they were being filmed by security cameras all over the store, a mob of young people descended on a convenience store on Sunset Road and Pecos Road like a swarm of locusts, stealing $600 worth of merchandise. "It became a feeding frenzy," said City Stop owner Jon Athey. "They were in the store for three minutes and 30 seconds. It's a pretty scary thing."

Athey told Channel 8's reporter the crowd darted in and snatched numerous items from the store. "Beer to jerky to candy bars to soda, whatever hit their fancy..." he said. Athey called this tactic a "swarm". He'd seen it done before, he went on, but after 42 years in the convenience store business, this swarm stands out as the biggest ever.

Gentle reader, I'm sure you get the picture. Notwithstanding that Walt hasn't said a word about race or colour, you probably have an image of the perps already in your mind's eye. Just for confirmation then, here's the video.




There are two more versions of this on the Channel 8 website. Thanks to Agent 17 for the lead.