From the Great No-longer-white North, one of Walt's Agents has sent some headlines which, using his crystal ball, he has seen in Canadian newspapers from the year 2030.
* Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions
* White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Canada's third language
* Children from two-parent, married, heterosexual families bullied in schools for being "different". Tolerance urged
* Brampton schoolgirl expelled for not wearing a burqa: Sharia law to be strictly enforced
* Japan announces that Japanese will no longer consume whale meat as whales are now extinct and workers in the scientific research fleet are unemployed. Canadian government tells Japanese squirrels taste like whalemeat.
* Canada now has ten Universities of Political Correctness. Professor Goldman of U of T says there is still a long way to go in the fight to stop people "saying what they think"
* Canada's deficit $20 trillion and rising. Government declares return to surplus in 100 years -- 300 years ahead of time. Prime Minister Mohammed Yousuf calls increased growth through more immigration the secret to success.
* Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped!
* Iran still quarantined. Physicists estimate ten more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels
* France pleads for global help after being taken over by Islamic countries. No other country volunteers to help the beleaguered nation
* Jose Manuel Rodriguez Bush says he will run for second term as US President in 2032.
* Canada Post raises price of stamps to $28 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
* Average weight of Canadian males drops to 252 lbs
* Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil and human rights. Victims to be held partly responsible for crime
* Average height of professional basketball players is now nine feet, seven inches
* New Liberal government law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2035 as lethal weapons
* Revenue Canada sets lowest tax rate in decades at 75 per cent.
American newspapers will likely feature similar headlines... only sooner!
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