"What's a trillion"?

Too much? Let's start with "What's a million?" That's a paraphrase of comments made by C.D. Howe, the Canadian "Minister of Everything" in the post-war Liberal government. During debate over estimates for the War Appropriation Bill in 1945,  Mr Howe told an opposition member, "I daresay my honourable friend could cut a million dollars from that amount, but a million dollars from the War Appropriations Bill (of more than $1.35 billion) would not be a very important matter."

John Diefenbaker, a Conservative MP, quickly rephrased Mr Howe’s words as "What's a million?" It is used even today to portray liberal governments' arrogance and looseness with the public purse.

Three-quarters of a century ago, a million dollars was a considerable sum of money. Half a century ago politicians went from talking of "millions" to "billions". Now even 000,000,000 (nine zeros) isn't enough, and another three zeros have been added to appropriations bills in Biden's US of A.

Last month, the Senate passed an infrastructure bill backed by Sleepy Joe, costed at roughly $1,000,000,000,000 -- a million million or trillion dollars. All of the Senate Dumbocrats and 19 Republicans (?) voted for it. It now needs to be approved by the House before being sent to Mr Biden's desk.

But wait... Apparently a trillion dollars isn't enough for the "progressive Democrats" in the House of Representative, who have vowed not to advance it unless and until the Senate passes an accompanying "reconciliation" bill which will cost... wait for it... $3.5 trillion!

The “Squad,” which includes Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY), have joined Burnie Sanders (I-VT), the chairman of the Senate budget committee, in refusing to budge on the linking of the two bills, as a package deal. 

They say moderate Democrats, like Sen. Joe Manchin (D-WV) and Kristen Sinema (D-AZ), are standing in their way by opposing the gargantuan price tag of the social safety net expansion, which includes funding for healthcare, climate change, childcare, affordable housing, and education, all for the benefit of "marginalized communities" suffereing from centuries of "systemic racism" yada yada yada.

Sen. Manchin, along with many Republicans argue that the national debt is too large for this type of spending, and that it could contribute to already higher-than-normal rates of inflation. He told the Clinton News Network today that Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer "will not have my vote on $3.5 (trillion) and Chuck knows that, and we’ve talked about this."

All this talk of billions and trillions reminded me of something I read in Bill Bryson's commendable Notes From a Big Country (Doubleday, 1998). The entire national debt, at the time Mr Bryson was writing, stood at $4.5 million, the total of the two bills now proposed by the Democraps. Mr Bryson puts millions, billions and trillions in terms than even I can understand. 

Big numbers are simply beyond what we are capable of grasping.... What does $4.5 trillion actually mean?

Let's just try for a trillion. Imagine that you were in a vault with the whole of America's national debt and you were told you could keep each dollar bill you initialled. Say, too, for the sake of argument, that you could initial one dollar bill each second and that you worked straight through without stopping. How long do you think it would take to count a trillion dollars?...

If you initialled one dollar per second, you would make $1000 every 17 minutes. After twelve days of non-stop effort you would acquire your first $1 million. Thus it would take you 120 days to accumulate $10 million and 1200 days -- something over three years -- to reach $100 million.

After 31.7 years, you would become a billionaire, and after almost a thousand years you would be as wealthy as Bill Gates.... But not until after 31,709.8 years would you count your trillionth dollar, and then you would be less than one-fourth of the way through the pile of money representing America's national debt.

That is what $1 trillion is.

The Mexican maid

The United States Congressional Budget Office warned yesterday that the American middle class faces its "worst decade in modern history". CBO director Doug Elmendorf said that without action by Congress to avoid the "fiscal cliff", Americans should expect a "significant recession" and the loss of some two million jobs. Something to think about between now and November.

Meanwhile, courtesy of the seldom-seen Agent 1, here's something to turn your frown into a smile.

The Mexican maid asked for a pay increase. The wife was very upset about this and decided to talk to her about the raise. "Now Maria," she asked, "why do you want a pay increase?"
Maria: "Well, Señora, there are tree reasons why I wanna increaze. The first is that I iron better than you."

Wife: "Who said you iron better than me?"
Maria: "Jor huzban he say so."
Wife: "Oh yeah?"

Maria: "The second reason eez that I am a better cook than you."
Wife: "Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?"
Maria: "Jor hozban did."
Wife, increasingly agitated: "Oh he did, did he???"

Maria: "The third reason is that I am better at sex than you in the bed."
Wife, really boiling now and through gritted teeth: "And did my husband say that as well?"
Maria: "No Señora...... The gardener did."
Wife: "So... how much do you want?"

Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors

Last December, Canadian Prime Minister Stephen "Steve" Harper paid a visit to Her Britannic Majesty's representative in Canada, Governor-General Michaelle Jean. Harper wanted a small favour. He wanted the GG to say "yes" to his request to prorogue (adjourn) Parliament so he wouldn't have to face a vote of confidence in the House of Commons, which he would have lost.

The Governor-General had an option. As Brian Mulroney would have said, she could have said, "No, it's wrong and I'm not going to do it." But she didn't. No surprises there. And so the Harper government lived to pick fights with the opposition another day.

One wonders what the conversation at Rideau Hall must have been like. Might we suppose that at the end of their colloquy Harper said to Jean, "Thanks! I owe you one."? Perhaps so, judging by what happened last week.

Yes, fellow taxpayers, last week Harper, on our behalf, forgave the republic of Haiti foreign aid loans totalling in the neighbourhood of $2.3 million. Michaelle Jean, lest we forget, is originally from Haiti. Perhaps she still has Haitian citizenship. (It never hurts to have another passport.) Perhaps she called the Prime Minister, at the behest of her countrymen (and countrywomen, to be politically correct) to call in the marker, as it were.

Will any good come of this? Not likely to the people of Haiti. Remember when Brian Mulroney paid an official visit to Zimbabwe. He also paid fulsome tribute to Robert Mugabe, one of the worst of the many dictators with which Africa has been cursed. And he generously said that Zimbabwe would not have to repay the millions of dollars in soft loans previously given by the Canadian government with our money. And where is that money now? Look in Mugabe's bank accounts in Switzerland and other havens!

Nor will any good come to Canada or Canadian taxpayers. Of course $2.3 million dollars is just a drop in the ocean of a $50 billion deficit. Still, one wishes that the Harper government would exercise just a little restraint every now and then, just for show, as it were.

Finally, let us ask who will forgive the Harper government for the mismanagement and profligacy that somehow turned the surplus inherited from the Liberal government of Paul Martin into the greatest deficit ever planned -- planned, mind you -- by any Canadian government at any time in history. Who indeed?