Thursday, April 28, 2011

A letter to Prime Minister Harper

Agent 3 has sent Walt a copy of his (?) letter to the once and future Prime Minister of Canada. (Lifetime pct: .973) While Agent 3's math may be off by a trillion dollars or so, the idea underlying his suggestions bears thinking about.

Dear Mr. Harper,

Please find below my suggestion for fixing Canada's economy. Instead of giving billions of dollars to banks and auto manufacturers who will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan:

There are about 2 million people over 50 in the workforce. Pay them $1 million apiece as severance pay for early retirement, with the following conditions:

1) They MUST retire. 2 million job openings. Unemployment fixed.

2) They MUST buy a new Made-in-Canada car. 2 million cars ordered. Auto industry fixed.

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage. Housing crisis fixed.

4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university. Crime rate fixed.

5) They MUST buy $50 worth of alcohol/tobacco/gasoline per week. There's your money back in duty, taxes, etc.

It can't get any easier than that!

Yours truly,
Ordinary Joe Canadian

No comments:

Post a Comment