Jimmy Kimmel, honorary mayor of Dildo NL CANCELLED

The summer of 2019 was quiet -- as usual -- in the tiny Newfoundland fishing village of Dildo, until August, when this happened.

On August 2nd, Jimmy Kimmel [Who he? Ed.], the host of a late night talk show called Jimmy Kimmel Live, started his allegedly funny show with a segment called "Canada has been hiding their Dildo". It was a story Newfoundlanders and Labradorians were able to rally behind and laugh about, and Lard Tunderin' Jaysus, dit ever put the province on the map, like never before!

What followed was 13 days of late night television, and years of unheard of tourism success for the region. As many as 4 or 5 (including YVT) showed up almost every day just to take pictures of the sign and send postcards bearing a fancy cancel which Canada Post made up just for the occasion.

 

Kimmel checked in almost nightly with the people of Dildo, sent security guard and international correspondent Guillermo to help run his campaign and used the Dildo Brewing Company as campaign headquarters. 

While Kimmel initially ran for the seat unopposed, rumours of an opponent stirred, none other than Matt Damon. [Who he? Ed.] But Kimmel remained strong in his pursuit of the mayor's chair, holding a press conference on his show. 

He stood firm on a "missionary" style of addressing taxation, and pointed to the fact that no one else was running for election. This was more than enough to win over the people of Dildo, The vote on August 15th was anything but close, and Kimmel was named mayor of the local service district in a landslide.

And look at him now, a victim of the cancel cuture which he and all the other Hollywood loonie lefties supported when it was them doing the cancelling. Now the shoe is on the other (i.e. right) foot, and Kimmel is looking for work. FAFO. But cheer up Jimmy. Your fans in Dildo (Sid and Doris Bonkers) will surely welcome you back.... Or maybe not....

Footnote: On his visit a couple of years ago, Walt was pleased to see this sign of support for Ukraine nailed to the front of the Society of United Fisherman hall, just across from the brewery.

Walt [and Ed.! Ed.] send best wishes to all the fine people of Dildo. May Jimmy Kimmel never return, and may bhe wind at your backs always be your own.