Thursday, November 21, 2013

Canucks too polite for their own good?

While recovering from minor surgery, Walt has had ample time to catch up on two political scandals which have been rocking the Canadian canoe this fall. I refer to the saga of Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, now at the end of Act I, and the ongoing Senate expenses scandal, which yesterday got close to directly implicating Canuck Prime Minister Steve Harper.

What Walt has learned about Canadians is that they are not just ultra-polite, but very forgiving, even when it comes to the grossest misconduct by their public officials. The forelock-tugging deference shown by those sheeple to VIPs is beyond amazing.


In neither case -- the Ford affair or the Wright-Duffy-Harper scandal -- has a single criminal charge been brought or a civil lawsuit commenced. In America, ravenous lawyers would have been all over the miscreants like pit bulls on poodles! In Canada, "the police are investigating; let justice take its course" is good enough for a citizenry that, in other countries, would have taken to the streets.

And get this! His Honour Mayor Ford and the Honourable Senators Duffy, Wallin and Brazeau are still in office! Apparently Canadians have no provision in their laws for recall elections. As for the Senators, they weren't elected in their first place -- just put in their positions at the trough courtesy of Prime Minister Harpoon.

What about impeachment, I hear you ask. My legal advisor, Agent 3, isn't sure if such a procedure exists in Canadian law. But, he says, he is unaware of any Canadian or provincial parliamentarian ever having been impeached. And the possibility of impeachment has not even been mooted.

Well then (I am still listening to you) why don't Mayor Ford and the three unjustly enriched senators -- Conservatives every one! -- do the honourable thing and resign? Errr, no... Resigning out of shame or as a matter of principle is something they do in Britain, maybe, but Canadian politicians follow the Nixon/Clinton precedents of not jumping until you're about to be pushed...and maybe not even then.


So the state of play today is this. The three Tory senators who have been found to have defrauded Canadian taxpayers of hundreds of thousands of dollars in illegitimate "expenses" have been suspended from the Red Trough ["Red Chamber", surely! Ed.] for the balance of this parliament. But they get to keep their perqs, medical and dental coverage, life insurance, and a generous pension plan paid for by...you know who.

Mayor Rob Ford still has an office (albeit a smaller one, barely big enough to accomodate his girth) in Toronto's city hall, and he still has a staff (also smaller) and a salary (not smaller). Plus he still gets to represent Toronto at various ceremonies and functions (but not the Santa Claus Parade or next year's Garrison Ball, Walt guesses), but will no longer be involved in day-to-day running of the city. That leaves him lots of time for appearances (presumably remunerated) on radio and TV not just in Toronto or Canada but also the USA where he has become an instant celeb -- kind of like Lindsay Lohan, only bigger and uglier.

Agent 78 says that in China they'd all have been shot. But not in Canada. Pity.

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