The truth about Rhodesia - a warning to liberals of the AABC countries

Rhodesia’s story isn't what you've been told! Today, it's barely mentioned at all. You would be hard-pressed to find, in the AABC countries (America, Australia, Britain and Canada), anyone under the age of 60 who could tell you what or where Rhodesia was. 

For 15 years (1965-1980), the world poured its energy into erasing Rhodesia from the map. But once it was gone, silence! Zimbabwe, like so many "decolonised" African nations, soon collapsed into chaos. Under Comrade Robert Mugabe, the dictator who ruled from independence in 1980 until he was deposted in a coup in 2017, and his successor Emmerson "E.D." Mnangagwa, the country was brought to ruin. Watch this video and ask whether the Rhodesians were really the villains history says they were, and what happens if people of that stripe come to power. FAFO!

Walt first visited Rhodesia, as it then was, some 57 years ago. As the narrator of this video says, the handwriting was on the wall, even then. When I returned to live in Zimbabwe (as Rhodesia had been renamed) in the 1990s, there were still many Africans (as black people like to be called) who said that things were better in the days of Rhodesian Prime Minister Ian Smith. 

After independence, Zimbabwe quickly became a basket case, destroyed by the corruption, ignorance and incompetence of the Marxist government of Comrade Mugabe. One of Walt's agents, who left the sinking ship at about the same time, and now resides in the Disunited Kingdom, returned in January to attend to some legal matters. She reports that things have not got any better in the quarter-century since we left. It is not wrong, she says, to regard Zimbabwe as a failed state, which has hit bottom and can never rise again. What a pity.

Zimbabwe: Bob's not your uncle any more

So, farewell at last, Comrade Robert Gabriel Mugabe, former tinpot dictator of what he turned into a shithole country. "Uncle Bob" (as no-one called him, ever) died early today in Singapore at the age of 95.

Most Zimbabweans would say (in whispers, if not out loud) that his death did not come soon enough to save his country from its precipitous descent into chaos and bankruptcy. Your Obdt Servant laboured in Zimbabwe during the late 1990s, trying to help its businesspeople learn modern, Western management techniques. But they couldn't adopt or adapt the things they learned, because they were stymied at every turn by Comrade Bob's Marxist policies, which turned the once-prosperous Rhodesia into an economic basket case.

"Things will be better once Bob goes," people said. But Bob replied, "Handiende!" It means "I will not go!" And he didn't, ruling the country with the proverbial iron fist from its independence in 1980 until, late in 2017, he was finally deposed by Comrade ED [No relation! Ed.] Mnangagwa (pictured below) in a bloodless coup. Since then, things have gotten no better, proving yet again that there is not one country in Africa who leaders -- black or brown -- are capable of managing an economy.

Instead, they rely on massive injections of foreign aid supplied by us chumps in the West, and latterly the Chinese, who still have a lot to learn about Africa, the land of bambazonke. Incompetence and corruption come naturally to African leaders. When mismanagement and kleptomania become too much for even the Swedes and the Brits to stomach (see "Reform or no support, UK tells ED", Zimbabwe Newsday, 6/9/19), the aid money stops flowing and the people starve.

Comrade Bob, who took power after the perfidious Brits sold out their Rhodesian kith and kin in 1980, said more than once that he wanted to rule for life. In that he was typical of the African "Big Man" syndrome, in which the people of shithole countries acquiesced in one-man rule by the likes of Hastings Banda (Malawi), Mobutu Sese Seko Kuku Ngbendu Wa Za Banga (Congo/Zaïre/Congo), Jean-Bédel Bokassa aka Emperor Bokassa I (Central African Republic) and Muammar Mohammed Abu Minyar Gaddafi (Libya - not all the Big Men were black Africans). But growing discontent about his government's maladministrationd a military intervention, impeachment proceedings by the parliament and large street demonstrations for his removal.

The November 2017 announcement of Comrade Mugabe's resignation (after he initially ignored escalating calls to quit, and take his lovely and fragrant wife Grace with him) triggered wild celebrations in the streets of the Ha-ha-harare, the fun capital of Africa. Well into the night, cars honked and people danced and sang in a spectacle of free expression that would have been impossible during his years in power and reflected hopes for a better future. But there has been no change for the povo (= poor people) of Zimbabwe, only more of the same, with an even Bigger Man ruling the roost. Prognosis? Dim and getting dimmer. Don't bother to stay tuned.

Further reading: The picture above was scraped from the Associated Press article "A look at the shattered Zimbabwe that Mugabe left behind", as posted on the CTV News site, 6/9/19. Quote from one of the povo: "Life was not that good [under Mugabe], but it was never this bad."

UPDATED - "This is Africa!" - Air Zimbabwe down to one plane

Half a century ago, when new "nations" were being created out of European colonies in Asia and Africa -- "Ready or not, here they come!" -- one of the hallmarks of newfound independence was considered to be a national airline. Even the tiniest shithole had to have a national carrier, usually included in the post-independence deal with the mother country.

So it was with Zimbabwe, when the former Rhodesia was handed over by the perfidious British to the black terrorists led by Robert Mugabe in 1980. The slight difference was that Rhodesia already had a small but functional airline, Air Rhodesia, which had a fleet of about a dozen aircraft including a couple of Viscounts -- lovely old prop jobs -- and even a B707. Like most things run by the "white settler regime", it worked. And it was given, in working order, to Comrade Bob's Marxist government, who painted the planes with red, yellow, green and black stripes and dubbed the "new" airline Air Zimbabwe.

Thanks to the ignorance, incompetence and corruption which bedevil most state-owned enterprises in most African countries, the planes inherited from Air Rhodesia were allowed to fall apart long ago. They were replaced by a succession of other types: B737s, a BAe-146, three Chinese MA-40s, a couple of little Fokkers, and two B767s which, in Walt's daze in Zimbabwe, were the pride of the fleet. One was at the beck and call of Uncle Bob, so effectively out of service, but the rest of us were allowed to fly in the other one, occasionally. Here's a pic I took in 1993 at what used to be called Jan Smuts International Airport, in Johannesburg.

Today, that B767-200ER is the only plane Air Zimbabwe has left, and may be grounded tomorrow or the next day. NewsDay reports that one of its two engines caught fire during a flight from O.R. Tambo International Airport (the new name for "Janny Smuts") to Ha-ha-harare (the fun capital of Zimbabwe) on Sunday evening after developing a fault. According to a state released yesterday, "Air Zimbabwe wishes to inform the public that their Boeing 767-200ER servicing flight UM462 experienced a malfunction in one of its engines, which caused a 'brief' tailpipe fire."

The carrier said the malfunction did not threaten the continuation of the flight or the safety of the crew and passengers on board, and that the aircraft landed safely in Harare at 2035. Air Zimbabwe confirmed that their engineers have started investigations into the incident, but continued, "We regret to inform our valued passengers that this incident may result in a disruption of our normal schedule."

This came barely a day after the same plane was involved in a bird strike incident after take-off at the Joshua Mqabuko Nkomo International Airport in Bulawayo. The plane, however, landed safely at Robert Gabriel Mugabe International Airport in the capital. In March, the struggling national airline said it was using the aircraft, the only one in service, for all its routes. Such is the reality of Zimbabwe today. Mother Africa Wins Again.

UPDATED ADDED 1/5/19 [MAYDAY! MAYDAY! LOL Ed.] - NewsDay reports today that "Beleaguered Air Zimbabwe has bought a new plane, an Embraer ERJ-145, bringing the number of planes owned by the company to two. Air Zimbabwe was put under construction [??? Ed.] in 2018 after it was diagnosed to be a failing parastatal. The new plane is branded Zimbabwe Airways which is the name of a failed airline that was fronted by former President Robert Mugabe's son-in-law, Simba Chikore." Right there, in the last two sentences, is everything you need to know about Zimbabwe and about how things work (or not) in Africa.

VIDEO LINK ADDED 19/6/19: "Air Zimbabwe - The World's Most Dangerous Airline?", the experience of a veteran traveller. Pretty much the way Walt remembers it, having flown in these same planes over 20 years ago.

ED wins Zimbabwe presidential election - quelle surprise!

The suspense is over. Just as I predicted this morning, the Zimbabwe Electoral Commission (ZEC) announced late tonight (local time) that ED is the winner of the country's presidential election. Noooooo! Not our Ed., but Comrade Emmerson D. Mnangagwa, popularly (?) known as "ED". Or "the Crocodile", but don't say that too loudly or his supporters (pictured cheering the announcement) will punish you for insulting the President, an offence under Zim law since the days of President Banana. No kidding. You can look it up.

The ZEC announced that ED had won 50.8% of the vote, just enough to avoid a runoff. Nelson Chamisa, candidate of the MDC Alliance, got 44.3%. As our friend Poor Len Canayen would say, the Crocodile had the puck nailed to his stick. Lifetime pct .992.

The ruling ZANU-PF party won 144 of the 210 seats in Zimbabwe's rubber-stamp parliament. That's a two-thirds majority, which would enable it to change the constitution in the unlikely event that the opposition candidate had won. The opposition Movement for Democratic Change (MDC) took 61 seats, and three seats remained "undeclared" when the lights went out tonight.

Shortly before the commission's announcement, the chief agent for the MDC Alliance took the stage at election central to say that his party "totally rejects" the results, and that he had not signed the papers. The police pictured in Walt's earlier post then escorted him from the room.

After being released, the chief agent said the elections were "fraudulent" and "everything has been done illegally." So, he said, he refused the ZEC's request to sign papers certifying Mnangagwa's win.
"We're not part of it," he said, adding that the opposition would be challenging the election in the courts.

The announcement came after clashes between opposition protesters and soldiers in Ha-ha-harare (the Fun Capital of Africa) left at least six people dead. The unrest marred what had been billed as an important milestone in Zimbabwe's efforts to return to democracy following 37 years of repression under longtime leader Robert Gabriel Mugabe. Comrade Bob is still alive but was unable to comment as he was said to be having a nap.

Zimbabwean dictator appointed to, then removed from WHO post

The Western world is having a good laugh today (but also breathing a sigh of relief) at the appointment and speedy unappointment [disappointment? Ed.] of Comrade Robert Gabriel Mugabe, dictator of Zimbabwe, as a "goodwill ambassador" for the World Health Organization (WHO). "Uncle Bob", however, is reportedly not amused.

The farce began on Wednesday in Uruguay, at a high-level WHO meeting to discuss non-communicable diseases. Comrade Bob had commandeered Air Zimbabwe's sole airworthy B-767 to attend, causing his countrymen to scratch their heads in wonderment, even though they have gotten used to their Dear Leader's peripatetic lifestyle, which has bankrupted the national airline and put a huge strain on the Zim treasury, which is now printing "bond notes" to cover its lack of real money.

Turns out the reason for the trip to a place few Africans have even heard of was that an "arrangement" had been made with WHO Director-General Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus, an Ethiopian recently appointed to the position, to appoint Mr Mugabe as a goodwill ambassador, out of respect for his government's devotion to providing free healthcare for all. Mr Ghebreyesus said he thought Mr Mugabe would be the ideal person to "to influence his peers in his region."

Many observers outside the Dark Continent (including yr obdt servant, who lived in Zimbabwe in the 1990s) thought the appointment must be a huge joke, given that Mr Mugabe is "peerless", in the sense that he has no equal for corruption, despotism and (alas!) longevity. He has ruled Zimbabwe since 1980, when the cowardly Brits sold out the "white settler régime" of Ian Smith and gave the former Rhodesia "majority rule" under the one-man-one-vote system.

The one man who has the one vote is Comrade Bob, who is 93 years old, but intends to stand for re-election next year, even if his lovely and fragrant wife Grace has to push him to the polls in his wheelchair. "Hendiende" is chiShona (the main local language) for "I won't go!"

The USA, Canada and a host of other countries, including Not-so-great Britain, were quick to criticize the WHO appointment. Canuck Prime Minister Justin "Junior" Trudeau called it a belated April Fool's joke. Donors and human rights groups expressed outrage. Comrade Bob, they noted, has for years been going overseas for medical treatment as Zimbabwe's once-prosperous economy (in the bad old colonial days) falls apart. He is not alone. Just last month, Vice-President Emerson Mnangagwa thought he'd been poisoned by eating bad ice cream from the Mugabe family's Gushongo Dairy, and hied himself off to South Africa to have his stomach pumped.

No Zimbabwean with any money trusts the country's decrepit healthcare system. As long ago as 2008, the charity Physicians for Human Rights released a report documenting failures in the system, saying that Mr Mugabe's policies had led to a man-made crisis. "The government of Robert Mugabe presided over the dramatic reversal of its population's access to food, clean water, basic sanitation and health care," the group found, adding that its policies led directly to "the shuttering of hospitals and clinics, the closing of its medical school and the beatings of health workers."

Today the WHO Director-General said in a statement, posted on his Twitter account @DrTedros, that he had listened to those expressing concerns. "Over the last few days, I have reflected on my appointment of H.E. President Robert Mugabe as WHO Goodwill Ambassador for NCDs in Africa. As a result I have decided to rescind the appointment."

Walt's comment: The appointment of the Zimbabwean dictator reflects everything that's wrong not just with Zimbabwe, not just with Africa, but with the World Health Organization and its mother "organization", the United Nations. The UN is nothing more than a powerless, self-serving talking shop, dominated by the beggars of the Third World, whose "diplomats" line their pockets and enjoy the luxurious, jet-setting lifestyle while their countrymen starve in squalor. The AABC countries (America, Australia, Britain and Canada) would do well to withdraw their financial support and leave the whole stinking mess to rot.

Is Zimbabwe's Comrade Bob Mugabe dead or just sleeping?

In yesterday's post in which I shared a story from Dr CZ about the desperation of life in today's Zimbabwe, I included a link to an earlier piece in which Graceless Mugabe, Comrade Bob's wife, was described as "widow-to-be". No sooner had Ed. got it up (the post, I mean) but I saw an article on the (Zimbabwe) NewsDay website headed: "Mugabe in fresh health scare".

A follow-up today says that NewsDay editor Wisdom Mudzungairi and reporter Richard Chidza have been arrested on charges of undermining or insulting the President of Zimbabwe, an offence that has been on the books since people started making fun of the name of the wretched country's first president -- Canaan Banana. Seriously. That was his name. He was only a figurehead president for the first couple of years of independence. As Prime Minister, Comrade Bob held the real power. Then he decided he didn't need a figurehead and made himself "executive president".

The NewsDay journos were arrested because of what they wrote about the President for Life (or Until Next Week -- whichever comes first) having been spirited out of the country, rushed to his doctors in Singapore for further treatment for prostate cancer or for some medical emergency. Perhaps he choked on a piece of birthday cake.

Whatever the problem is, merely mentioning it is "undermining or insulting the President", in the eyes of Zimbabwe's rulers, hence the arrests of the NewsDay newshounds.  Their lawyer, Obey Shava of Zimbabwe Lawyers for Human Rights, confirmed that the duo, together with Alpha Media Holding legal assistant Sifikile Thabete, handed themselves at Harare Central Police Station where they were summoned to report to the Law and Order department. The trio have since been released into the custody of their lawyer.

Walt wonders whether, if Comrade Bob dies in Singapore (lifetime pct .992), the charges against The NewsDay Three will be dropped? Perhaps that depends on who succeeds him. Queue his lovely wife Graceless, last heard at his birthday bash in Bulawayo muttering "Let him eat cake..."

Hundreds of Zimbos* fall for joke employment offer

Assiduous readers will know that Walt spent some years, before the turn of the century, knocking around Zimbabwe (the Rhodesia that was), watching a state becoming a failed state, before my very eyes. Almost everyone I knew there has since departed the country, or departed this life entirely So, to keep up with the news from the Dark Continent, I rely on my old chum, Dr CZ, who writes the second part of "Cabinet Files" in the Financial Gazette, every Thursday. It is Dr CZ who calls his compatriots "Zimbos", *meaning "Zimbabweans", nothing more or less.

In last week's column, Dr CZ invited Zimbos interested in assisting him in carrying out a strategic survey that he was planning to undertake to contact him as a matter of urgency. Here is the notice which appeared at the end of the column.

"This is very urgent. Dr CZ is looking for six Zimbos out there who are willing to help him with some strategic research that he will be conducting in the next few days. It is a three-day contract. Over and above being provided with transport, accommodation and meals, the assistants — who should be holders of at least any tertiary qualification — will each be paid an allowance of US$800 per day. The contract days are from the 29 to 31 of this month. Anyone interested should urgently e-mail their name and contact number to the e-mail below. The offer is strictly on a first-come-first-served basis."

The column appeared on February 23rd, and readers will note that the contract on offer was to run "from the 29 to 31 of this month". The joke should have been obvious to anyone who learned "30 days hath September...", but it seems post-colonial Zimbabwean education does not include any reference to that little saying. This week, Dr CZ reports on the aftermath, as follows...

"Although Dr CZ had just asked for those interested to submit their names and contact numbers for the piece of work that was to take place between February 29 and 31, as late as at the time of going to print this March, desperate emails were still trickling into his mail-box… most of them accompanied with bulky CVs and several phone numbers and dozens of the applicants are holders of several post graduate degrees. It was one of Dr CZ’s many asinine pranks that many of his fans took seriously. What was intended to start and end as just harmless mischief has turned out to be a real survey. The results of the survey show what happens when people become hopelessly desperate.

"If the applicants were mere village yokels who could hardly tell their left from right, one would have assumed that none of them knew that the dates on which the survey was supposed to take place do not exist on this side of the rainbow yet, but these are very educated men and women whose basic commonsensical reasoning has since been evaporated by the dire personal situations they find themselves in.

"Most of these people could be fathers and mothers, whom entire clans look upon. Yet they cannot do anything about their situation. This explains why seemingly normal people end up doing things that people in normal situations would not think possible. This perpetuates the abnormality that this country is increasingly getting known to be. This is the sad reality of the situation that this country has deteriorated to… never mind what officialdom says."

Quite right. 37 years after the perfidious British sold out Ian Smith's "white settler regime" to the darker-complected Africans, Zimbabwe has become a basket case... with the bottom now on the verge of falling out of the basket. With every passing day, Zimbabwe gets worse and worse. The Dark Continent gets ever darker.

Further reading: "Mugabe's corpse could win next Zimbabwe election, widow-to-be says", WWW 18/2/17.

Happy birthday, Comrade Bob!

Further to "Mugabe's corpse could win next Zimbabwe election, widow-to-be says" (WWW 18/2/17), Walt hopes that Brian Gable, the Globe and Mail's estimable editorial cartoonist, will not mind our reposting of this graphic representation of this weekend's birthday celebrations for Comrade Robert Gabriel Mugabe, President for Life and Beyond.

Mugabe's corpse could win next Zimbabwe election, widow-to-be says

Comrade Robert Gabriel Mugabe, Past-Present-and-Future President of the People's Republic of Zimbabwe, turns 93 next week. "Uncle Bob" has ruled Zimbabwe ever since the perfidious British handed the peaceful and prosperous country known as Rhodesia over to the black majority in 1980. He has never been officially declared President For Life, but that's how things have turned out. Now his second wife, Grasping Grace, says his reign will continue, even if (as most Zimbabweans wish) he dies.

Speaking on Thursday at a party rally in a dorp called Buhera, Zimbabwe's First Lady suggested that even if her husband's corpse is put on the ballot paper for elections due in 2018, people would still vote for him. The lovely and fragrant Grace has in the past made numerous controversial suggestions regarding Comrade Bob's 37-year rule, at one point claiming he will rule Zimbabwe from the grave or from a wheelchair, whichever comes first!

Mr Mugabe was one of the ruling Zanu-PF party's biggest strengths, his widow wannabe said. "Our first strength is in President Mugabe. Even if we go anywhere people will respect him," she said, adding even children were aware of his importance. "You hear people accusing me of still wanting to continue as the First Lady of this nation," she went on, "saying that is why I don't want to tell the President to retire. I am not the only one who voted for him. Only a fool will say that. We will field a candidate of a corpse on the ballot if God takes Mugabe and people will vote for him just to show how much the President is loved."

After the thunderous applause from the Zanu-PF supporters (Sid and Doris Moyo) died down, Grace added, "Let's wait for God's time when He decides that Mugabe should stop and then we enter into the race. But one thing you must not forget is that if you don't have Mugabe's support it will be difficult for you."

Walt, who lived in Zimbabwe for some time back in the day, would add that life itself will be difficult for the people of that unfortunate country, no matter who's squatting in the State House bequeathed to the ruler by the evil whites. Mother Africa always wins.

Death watch 2016 and other stuff

It's been a quiet weekend here in Lake Wo... [Hold it right there; that line's been taken. Ed.] [No! Garrison Keillor's line was "It's been a quiet WEEK (etc)."] What I mean to say is that I didn't do much, read much or think much, therefore have not much about which to write. However, I did ruminate [Not on the carpet, I hope! Ed.] about how old everyone is getting, except myself of course.

The cause of my rumination was my discover, in Jeremy Paxman's highly recommendable book On Royalty (Penguin 2006, Public Affairs 2007), that Eliabeth II, Queen of Great Britain, Northern Ireland, yada yada yada, will turn 90 in April. 90! Imagine that! She doesn't look a day over 80, does she. What, I thought, are the odds that she won't live to see her 90th birthday? Pretty long, I should think, given that her mother lived to 101. I expect Prince Charles will have to wait until 2017 at the very earliest.

But there are other octogenarians and nonagenarians who might not make it through 2016. Some bookie in England probably takes bets. Wonder what odds they're giving on the Queen's consort, Phil the Greek (as Private Eye calls him). Probably long odds as well, given Prince Philips damn-them-all outlook on life.

How about Pope Francis? Only in his 80s, but rumoured almost since his election to be in failing health. Perhaps for some Traditional Catholics the wish is father to the thought.

If not the Pope, then how about a President, or, I should say, former President, thinking of poor old Jimmy Carter. He thinks he may be free of cancer, but then he also thinks a little more goodwill will bring peace to the world. He should live so long!

The President almost everyone would like to see them close the lid on would certainly be Comrade Robert Gabriel Mugabe, President for Life of Zimbabwe. For the last couple of years he's been grooming his second wife, Grace, to be his successor. She seems to think she's ready for the job, and I wouldn't be surprised if she's prepared to wait another year. Perhaps she would go so far as to hasten the Old Man's demise. Hey, it's Africa!

Well, that's enough death watch. Let me close by giving out this week's Walt Award for Super-DUH! Headlines. No, it's not "China may be using sea to hide its submarines", rightly ridiculed here on Friday. That beauty was pipped at the post by a late entry from the Globe and Mail. Over a story from Reuters about an entirely predictable disaster in Mumbai, the Groan and Wail ran the headline "Huge fire engulfs venue at ‘Make in India’ event". Not stupid, really, just funny. Congratulations.

If you're not sure why Walt would find that headline and story funny, consider what Prince Philip had to say on the subject of Indian wiring. See "Prince apologises as latest gaffe offends Indians", in the Grauniad, 11/8/99.

Further reading: Jeremy Paxman, mentioned above, is a British journalist, best known for his work presenting BBC's Newsnight and University Challenge, the latter on my must-watch list when I lived in Olde Blighty. He has also written some eminently readable books, including On Royalty, and The English: A Portrait of a People (Penguin 1999). It is, of course, impossible to understand the English, but Mr. Paxman makes a very good attempt to explain the unexplainable.

Mugabe may not be a goblin* but...

he's a real cool surfer dude!

OK, it's a meme. You knew that, didn't you? Ed. scraped it off a story on the Zimbabwe NewsDay site. Where did the image of Comrade Bob falling originate? Have a look at this (from The Grauniad).



What happened was that Zimbabwe's nonagenarian President-for-Life tripped as he descended the platform after addressing supporters on his return from Addis Ababa, where he was installed as Chairman of the so-called African Union. Reporters and photographers who have been on death watch for at least a decade started clicking and tweeting immediately, but, alas, His Excellency got up again.

* See "Mugabe not a 'goblin', sez Chief Justice of Zimbabwe"

Mugabe not a "goblin", sez Chief Justice of Zimbabwe

One of these critters is a goblin. The other one...isn't. So says the Honourable Godfrey Chidyausiku, Chief Justice of Zimbabwe, in a statement on the case against former Nyanga North Member of Parliamet Douglas Mwonzora, who stands accused of labelling President Robert Mugabe a “goblin” during a rally held in Nyanga in 2009.

The judge wanted Zimbabwe's state prosecutors to explain whether it was constitutional for the State to prosecute politicians for calling the Head of State "Gamatox"* or "weevil" while addressing political rallies.

"Politicians call each other names such as weevils and Gamatox, are you suggesting that you prosecute people for that?" Mr. Justice Chidyausiku asked.

"If somebody calls the President a weevil or Gamatox, are you going to prosecute that person? It is part of the trade of politics. Why are you bringing such matters to the Constitutional Court? The President is not a goblin and we all know that. Why should the law bother itself about it? You have to be an imbecile to believe that the President is a goblin."

But, the State prosecutor replied, Mr. Mwonzora’s labelled the Head of State a goblin which "feeds on human blood". (Walt can't tell what's on the plate in the picture, but it doesn't look like blood.)

"The statement causes ridicule to the President who is viewed as a monster, bad person who causes problems and feeds on human blood," the prosecutor went on. "This is why the State insists that the statement constitutes an offence."

However, counsel for the accused argued, Mr. Mwonzora’s statements did not constitute an offence, but were subjective and meaningless since Mugabe was not a goblin.

In the same speech, Mr. Mwonzora is alleged to have castigated Comrade Bob's alleged bad governance, thieving, arrest of innocent individuals and the seizure of their property. The State prosecutor has chosen not to focus on that part.

* "Gamatox" is the brand name of an insecticide sold in Zimbabwe.

Zimbabweans wishing to run whites back INTO town?

Tomorrow will mark the 34th anniversary of Zimbabwe's deliverance from the rule of the "white settlers". At the time when the reins of government -- and the keys to the bank vault and printing presses -- were handed over to Comrade Robert Gabriel Mugabe, Rhodesia (as it then was) enjoyed a standard of living second in southern Africa only to that of South Africa.

Rhodesia was a net exporter of food, the infrastructure (including a railway and an airline) worked, life expectancy was rising and it took two American dollars to buy a Rhodesian dollar. Now, having been looted six ways from Sunday by Mugabe's kleptocracy, Zimbabwe is an economic basket case. Millions of Zimbabweans are dying, not just from HIV/AIDS but from hunger. 1/12th of its citizens, including all but a handful of whites, are living overseas.

Celebrations of independence and "majority rule" will thus be a little muted. Some older people even dare to suggest that perhaps things were better in the days when the country was run by people who knew how, even if those people were, errr, a whiter shade of pale. Here are some thoughts along those lines from Walt's old friend CZ, writing in this week's Financial Gazette.

Patriotic as Dr CZ would love to be seen to be, if he is going to be allowed the freedom to be honest, he would confess that he is divided as to which event to celebrate tomorrow… that is if he has an option to choose between independence and Easter Friday.

There are, however, many reasons CZ would rather celebrate Easter than independence because independence is there, yes, but a lot of things are quite amiss… so amiss as to tempt some like Yours Truly to think Ian Smith could have been right after all when he told the then newly-sworn in Prime Minister Robert Mugabe at his new official residence in 1980 that the success of the new nation depended largely on the size of the white component of the population that new government was able to retain.

What the political hooligan called Smith was simply doing was wantonly casting aspersions at the leadership qualities of black people, which naturally was an insult to any patriot. Sadly, Dr CZ now feels that the collective behaviour of many of our leaders over the years — be they political, business, religious et al — seem to be totally divorced from anything remotely suggestive of even a fleeting hint towards debunking this “stereotypical nonsense”. Dr CZ regrets it if he has failed to properly articulate his point as to sound racist!

Re Mandela -- Just fancy that!

Headline and subhead in the online edition of today's Notional Post:
What's next in racially charged South Africa?
Mandela’s vision of a ‘rainbow nation’ failed, almost inevitably, to meet the heady expectations propelling the country two decades ago

Headline on Walt's first post yesterday:
What happens, now that the black "redeemer" has died?


The accompanying text points out that today's South Africa is hardly the paradise on earth that Mandiba and those who used his name promised would follow the end of the "racist white apartheid regime". The truth is that South Africa is becoming more like its neighbours north of the Limpopo -- going back to bush, that is -- with every passing day. "Almost inevitably", as the Post would say.

Footnote from Ed.: Geoffrey York, the Glob and Mail's man in Africa, had a piece published just a couple of days ago -- terrible timing, that -- headed "Nearly 90, Mugabe still driving Zimbabwe's economy into the ground".

Unfortunately it was behind the G&M's "Unlimited" firewall so we weren't able to read it. But we take Mr. York's point to be that if Mugabe lives another five years -- as everyone fears -- he'll actually finish the job that Mandela only started.

What happens, now that the black "redeemer" has died?

Nelson Mandela died today, at the age of 95. RIP. Now that he's gone to his reward, you can expect an outpouring of breast beating and maudlin sentiment such as has not been seen since the assassination of Martin Luther King Jr. Mandela would be a candidate for instant sainthood, if only he were Catholic. [In today's Church, do you really have to be Catholic? Ed.]

Mixed in with all the weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth will be a large dose of anti-colonial, anti-white rhetoric. Comparisons will be made with the plight of the Jews in the Egypt of the Pharaohs. The Afrikaners will be cast in the role of the evil oppressors, while Mandela is portrayed as the Holy Moses who led his people out of bondage and into... well... into what? Into the promised land of black empowerment, equal rights for all (even queers), and all the blessings a "rainbow nation" can bestow.

Conveniently overlooked will be the fact that, for the vast majority of its people, South Africa is no better -- and in some respects worse -- than it was in the days of apartheid. The education system is in freefall, corruption is rife, and violent crime threatens virtually everyone. In other words, South Africa has become like the rest of sub-Saharan Africa under black rule.

Walt hopes that in the last couple of years of his life, Mr. Mandela's faculties were so dimmed by illness and old age that he was unaware of what a shambles his people have made of his beloved country.

Here's a quote from an early work by V.S. Naipaul, an ethnic Indian native of Trinidad, with some experience of Africa and the failings of countries, including his own, in the post-colonial era. This is from "Michael X and the Black Power Killings in Trinidad", which appeared in a fine little collection entitled The Return of Eva Peron, with the Killings in Trinidad (André Deutsch, 1980).

Black Power -- away from its United States source -- is jargon...a sentimental hoax. In a place like Trinidad, racial redemption is as irrelevant for the Negro as for everybody else. It obscures the problems of a small independent country with a lopsided economy, the problems of a fully "consumer" society that is yet technologically untrained and without the intellectual means to comprehend the deficiency. ] [Emphasis mine. Walt]

It perpetuates the negative, colonial politics of protest. It is, in the end, a deep corruption: a wish to be granted a dispensation from the pains of development, an almost religious conviction that oppression can be turned into an asset, race into money.

While the dream of redemption lasts, Negroes will continue to exist only that someone might be their leader. Redemption requires a redeemer; and a redeemer, in these circumstances, cannot but end like the Emperor Jones: contemptuous of the people he leads, and no less a victim, seeking an illustory personal emancipation.

In Trinidad, as in every black West Indian island, the too easily awakened sense of oppression and the theory of the enemy point to the desert of Haiti.

Hmmm. Haiti. Yes. And Mr. Naipaul wrote that in the mid-70s [when you could still use the word "Negro". Ed.]. Look at Haiti today -- more of a "desert" than it was 40 years ago. Look too at Zimbabwe, whose "redeemer", Comrade Robert Gabriel Mugabe, is only 90, but determined to hang onto power until the desertification of his country is complete. Mr. Mandela, at least, was spared that.

More on (race + poverty = Africa)

A few days ago, in "Race and poverty by the numbers", Walt posted statistics from the United Nations Human Development Index (as listed in The Economist's Pocket World in Figures, 2013 edition) confirming that the poorest, least developed countries on earth are for the most part in sub-Saharan -- i.e. black -- Africa.

There are other ways of measuring poverty and general hopelessness. One Arthur Okum devised The Misery Index, which looks at two basic things -- rates of unemployment and inflation. The idea is simple. If you haven't got a job, and the price of the necessities of life is soaring, you're going to be miserable. So, the higher the sum of these rates, the more miserable the country.

Yahoo!'s Business Insider looked at 197 countries and territories, from Afghanistan to Zimbabwe, to compile its Misery Index for 2013.

You may be surprised, gentle reader, to learn that the 10 most miserable countries are not all in sub-Saharan Africa. And they're not all black. Here, with Walt's comments, are numbers 10 through 7.

10. Syria - Not really a surprise that a country torn apart by a civil war should be miserable.

9. Kosovo - In the Balkans. Mostly Muslim.

8. Nepal - Small, landlocked, backward. Chief export: prostitutes sent to India.

7. Namibia - Another lately independent southern African country, formerly run by South Africa. Unemployment rate around 85%.

6. Djibouti - Check your atlas. On the horn of Africa. People chew qat all day and all night. That's all you need to know.

5. Turkmenistan - Part of formerly Soviet central Asia. Muslim.

4. Belarus - An unreconstructed Communist dictatorship between Poland and Russia. Chief export: see Nepal, but the chief importer is Turkey.

And now we come to the Most Miserable Three.

3. Burkina Faso, a.k.a. The Land of Upright Men. Formerly part of French West Africa. Large population (mostly Muslim) and very limited natural resources. Still reeling from the after-effects of a severe drought in 2011. Unemployment rampant. Chief export: nothing.

Even so, things are better than they used to be. According to CIA Factbook used by Yahoo! for this project, "The risk of a mass exodus of the 3 to 4 million Burkinabe who live and work in Côte D'Ivoire has dissipated and trade, power, and transport links are being restored."

2. Liberia. In the 19th century well-meaning American liberals tried to solve the "black problem" by sending freed slaves "back home" to a small chunk of west Africa which they called "Liberia". The capital is "Freetown". The flag has red and white stripes, like the US flag, but, like Freetown's best hotel, only one star.

Like many other sub-Saharan African countries, Liberia is heavily reliant on foreign aid. Its economy was destroyed by civil war, government mismanagement and corruption. 85% of the country's labour force cannot find steady employment. Maybe they should have stayed in the USA?

The worst of the worst, the most miserable country of all, is... Wait for it...

1. Zimbabwe

It's the same old African story -- sloth, ignorance, incompetence and corruption -- writ large by the kleptocracy of Comrade Bob Mugable, which denies Zimbabweans basic rights like freedom of assembly and the protection of the law.

Zimbabwe's economy is actually shrinking (source: Pocket World in Figures). So is the population with literally millions having fled to the UK, Canada, the USA, Australia, or any other non-black country. Or even South Africa which sends them back as fast as they can but still can't stem the tide of refugees.

After the Zimbabwe dollar (a.k.a. "Zimkwacha") reached exchange rates of billions for one US dollar in 2009, Comrade Bob was forced to abandon his worthless currency and adopt the US dollar, which reduced inflation to "normal" levels. However, the Zimbabwean unemployment rate is estimated to be 95%, and the CIA Factbook warns that the true rate is "unknowable" under current conditions.

Those who accused Walt of distorting reality and "blaming the victim" in "Blaming the white settlers for the plight of black Africa" don't need to take my word for it. Read the Misery Index! Better yet, go to Zimbabwe. If you can find any old-timers -- the few still alive who can remember what their country was like before "majority rule" -- ask them if they're better off now than they were in the days of "the racist white settler regime".

Blaming the white settlers for the plight of black Africa

In yesterday's post about the correlation between race and poverty -- the poorest countries on earth being overwhelmingly in black (sub-Saharan) Africa -- I anticipated the hoary left liberal argument that it's all the fault of the colonists.

Here's what the revisionist historians and lamestream media keep telling us.
The British, French and others took all the resources and left nothing behind.
They drew "national boundaries" without regard to linguistic, cultural and, errr, tribal differences.
They imposed on Africa systems of social organization and government which are "unsuitable" to Africans. Like democracy.

Let me just relate my own personal observations of southern Africa.

I first visited Zimbabwe in the days when it was still Rhodesia. The status of the country, in 1968-9 when I was there, was disputed. Its white government  -- called "the white settler regime" by the Western (and Communist) media -- declared independence from Britain on 11 November 1965. We can run our own affairs, they told the Brits. There was a precedent for this course of action, set back in... wait for it... 1776, by a country which has gone on to achieve considerable stature in the world.

Why would the rest of the world not recognize Rhodesia's Unilateral Declaration of Independence? The problem was race. Of course. The founding fathers of the USA were white. And they kept black slaves, or at least some of them did. But the white folks were in the majority of the Thirteen Colonies, so everything was OK, except perhaps with George III and Lord North.

The government of Ian Smith  was similarly composed of white men. They (or their families) came to their country from Britain and did what they could to develop the land and the people they found there. Unlike Washington and Jefferson, though, they did not keep slaves.

Unfortunately for the white Rhodesians, they comprised only about 1% of the population at the time of UDI. Thus the Smith government was inevitably and always referred to as "the white minority regime".

"Africa for Africans" was the slogan shouted incessantly following Harold Macmillan's "Winds of Change" speech, which signalled Britain's loss of will to govern its colonies. "We're tired," said the Brits. "Let the Africans look after themselves."

What was wrong with "Africa for Africans"? The "white tribes" of Rhodesia and South Africa were quick to point out that they were Africans too -- not just by adoption or settlement, but by birth, with family histories in Africa going back in some cases to the 17th century.

So, the liberals and those bent on the destruction of the West changed the party line to "Africa for the real Africans", meaning the blacks. Well, OK, coloureds too. And maybe Asians. Everyone except the honkies.

Rhodesia was the second-last of the white dominoes to fall. The Portuguese  gave up on Moçambique and Angola in the 70s. South Africa finally succumbed to "majority rule" in 1994. The British betrayed their kith and kin and Rhodesia, effectively selling out to Comrade Robert Mugabe and his terrorist buddies in 1980.

When I visited Rhodesia in 1968-9, there was a small but healthy economy, growing in spite of illegal international sanctions. The country was more than self-sufficient in food, a net exporter to the rest of the continent. The Rhodesian dollar was worth around two US dollars. The major cities (Salisbury, Bulawayo and Umtali) had electricity and clean water, and were connected by well-maintained paved highways. There was a small but reliable airline. Schools and hospitals provided all Rhodesians -- black and white -- with education and health care unmatched in any of the "black countries" to the north.

All this -- the thriving economy, the modern infrastructure, the lot -- was the work of the "evil white settlers". This was the legacy the "racist colonialists" handed over to Mugabe and his henchmen.

By the time I returned to Zimbabwe, as Rhodesia was renamed, in 1992, the capital city (now called "Harare") was in a state of decay. It has got worse still in the 20 years since. You can't drink the water now. Electricity is intermittent. Air Zimbabwe exists only to fly Comrade Bob to hospitals and shopping malls in other parts of the world. The roads are crumbling. Traffic lights have been stolen for the scrap value of the metal frames.

Hospitals are short-staffed and virtually without equipment or even medicines. The educational system is a shambles. The economy, which all but collapsed with the Zimbabwe dollar, is actually shrinking, and has never matched its pre-independence levels. And as land seized from white farmers lies idle, hundreds of thousands of Zimbabweans are starving.

Who is responsible for the plight of today's Zimbabwe? The government has been in the hands of "the majority" -- actually a "majority" of just one man -- for nearly 33 years. A perusal of The Economist's Pocket World in Figures reveals the country as a basket case. It is going back to bush, and that's a fact! It's also a fact that it wasn't the "evil white settlers" -- most of whom are gone now -- who built the basket.

Zimbabwe's wounds are, like those of the rest of Africa, self-inflicted. The "real Africans" got their hands on the "white houses and white cars" they coveted, and they have made their country "really African".

Picture credit: The image of Ian Smith is taken from a cover of Time magazine. Mr. Smith died in 2007.

Same-sex "marriage" fine for some, not for Africa and Asia?

What can you say about a country that earlier this week had a grand total of $217 in its national bank? You can say that it's poor. You can say that its government is a kleptocracy. You can say that it must be in Africa. All those things are true of Comrade Robert Mugabe's Zimbabwe, last on the list of members of the Disunited Nations, and last on just about every other list you can think of.

Comrade Bob, however, doesn't care about how his country looks in the eyes of the rest of the world. He will go his own way, and the West and the rest be damned. And many of his subjects agree with him.

One thing "Bob's-your-uncle" is adamant about is the immorality of homosexuality. He goes way beyond the stance of the Roman Catholic Church, of which he is nominally a member. The Church calls homosexuality "objectively disordered" but asks that gays be treated with understanding and compassion, and given pastoral help not to change their sexual orientation but to live with it in conformity to God's commandments.

Where that becomes difficult is in matters like same-sex "marriage". The Church, along with every other religion in the world, has always maintained that marriage is a solemn and sanctified bond between a man and a woman. It has been so since Adam and Eve. Until lately, that is.

Now we have the wimmin's libbers and gay activists clamouring for "equal rights", by which they mean licence to do whatever they damn well please, no matter what God or mere mortals may think, and no matter what damage is done to the fabric of society. Christianity is now so weak, and the LGBT agenda -- see WWW passim -- is being pushed so hard and so successfully that same-sex "marriage" is now legal in large parts of the so-called Christian world. (A better term would be "post-Christian West".)

The rest of the world -- Asia, the Middle East and Africa -- is different, and intends to remain so. You don't see people agitating for same-sex "marriage" in China or Japan or Egypt or Saudi Arabia or Uganda or... wait for it... Zimbabwe.

In fact, Zimbabwe proposes to make same-sex "marriage" illegal! Its leaders -- not just Bob but leaders of the opposition -- have approved the draft of a new constitution, to be tabled in the Zimbabwean Parliament on February 8th.

According to an article in NewsDay, Section 4.78 of the draft, on marriage rights, prohibits forced marriages, marriages of people under the age of 18 and between people of the same sex.

One of the co-chairthingies of the drafting committee called the clause a clear statement that Zimbabwe does not condone homosexuality. Said Munyaradzi Paul Mangwana, "This is the first time we have this clause in our constitution.... There will be other legal instruments to enforce it, such as the Sexual Offences Act. It's clear sexual relationships between people of the same sex are prohibited."

Mugabe has long been a fierce critic of homosexuality. He has often criticised it as unAfrican and branded gays and lesbians as "worse than pigs and dogs". He has also said, as the Church says, that same-sex relationships are ungodly -- not according to God's law or natural law.

Douglas Mwonzora, the other co-chair, said homosexuality was a criminal offence in Zimbabwe, as it is in many other Asian and African countries. "The constitution cannot prescribe a crime, but the issue of homosexuality can be covered under the criminal law of sodomy," Mwonzora said. "Same-sex marriages are prohibited and homosexuality is a crime under the country's criminal laws."

What should Western "gay rights" campaigners and same-sex "marriage" advocates make of third-world opposition to their agenda? Are the countries where marriage is still just for men and women backward and uncivilized?

Once upon a time the Christian nations sent missionaries to places like Zimbabwe to preach the gospel which says that homosexual acts are evil. (See St. Paul's epistle to the Romans.) Should we now send missionaries to say that those who came a century ago were wrong, and that what was once regarded as evil is now to be not just tolerated but encouraged? Don't be surprised...

Prognostications for 2013

Making predictions about what will happen in the future is a mug's game. Rather than put my sterling track record (lifetime pct .988) on the line, let me tell you (mostly) what's not going to happen in 2013.

America will not fall over the fiscal cliff, at least not all the way. Absent an agreement in the Senate, taxes will (effectively) be increased and spending will be cut, as planned. Most Americans will still be able to get by. No-one will be selling apples of Wall Street or Main Street USA.

Haiti will not be repaired, rebuilt or reconstructed. Billions of dollars in aid money will continue to be poured down the rathole with no apparent effect. Michaëlle Jean will continue to be invisible, at least in her native land.

Hellery Clinton will not announce her candidacy for the presidensity. The campaign will move ahead anyway, with the support of the lamestream media and Democrats living overseas who don't actually have to cope with the Obama maladministration.

Zimbabwe's dictator, Comrade Robert Gabriel Mugabe, will not lose an election to Zuma wannabe Morgan Tsvangirai or anyone else. Indeed, it's quite possible no election will be held. The zimkwacha (Zimbabwe dollar) will not be reintroduced, as remaining supplies are used up as toilet paper.

Pope Benedict XVI will do nothing to lead the Roman Catholic Church back to the traditional Faith of our fathers. But nor will he abdicate, for fear of the fight that would ensue between Cardinal Bertone -- the man who would be pope -- and the thousands of good Catholic clergy and laypeople who think Bertone is the Antichrist whose arrival is imminent.

Bumbling, horse-faced Peter Mackay will not be Canada's Minister of Defence a year from now. The stench of mismanagement and opacity enveloping the proposed purchase of F-35 fighters for the Royal Canadian Air Force won't go away. At least one head must roll, and Machackey's contains nothing but air, so off it comes!

Gary Bettman, the Jewish American lawyer responsible for the Americanization (hence destruction) of hockey, will not be head honcho of the National Hockey League at this time next year. He has the outward support of a majority of NHL owners, but look for someone to check him into the boards shortly after he presents the Stanley Cup.

Christians (in name, at least) will continue to be persecuted, imprisoned and murdered by Muslims in Afghanistan, Iraq, Syria, Nigeria, India, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia [We're running out of space! Ed.], and by Communists in China, North Korea, Cuba, Vietnam, [Enough martyrs! Ed.] The Church and Western leaders will continue to say we must show tolerance to our poor misunderstood enemies, learn to accommodate them and celebrate diversity!

Note from Ed.: Walt has scribbled a note at the bottom of his manuscript: "That's all I can stands. I can't stands no more!" Hmmm. Well, in spite of his less-than-rosy forecast, Walt and I wish you a New Year filled with peace and prosperity.

Mugabe calls Jamaica a nation of pot-smokers

Comrade Bob Mugabe, the head nagger of Zimbabwe, owes his too-long life to lean living. He neither drinks alcohol nor smokes anything. Certainly not "mbanje" which is the chiShona word for marijuana, the sacramental herb so beloved of Jamaicans like Saint Bob Marley, after whom Mugabe was named.

Speaking last week at the "Research and Intellectual Expo" in his country's capital, Uncle Bob made some rather strong statements about Jamaica, which he described as a nation of marijuana smokers, where women were now taking charge since men were always sloshed.

Mugabe said he wished Zimbabwe had never followed the footsteps of Jamaicans whose influence on the impoverished African country is pervasive.
"In Jamaica they have freedom to smoke mbanje, men are always high, and universities are full of women. The men want to sing and do not go to colleges. Some are dreadlocked. Let us not go there," was how Mugabe put it.

Toronto (Canada) mayor Big Bob Ford is studying Mugabe's remarks from behind the wheel of his Escalade while stuck in traffic. And Jamaican Foreign Affairs minister A.J. Nicholson said on Sunday that his government was aware of the report but is not yet in a position to comment, as everyone is recovering from the weekend jump-up.