Some assembly required

I do hope the reverend fathers who read WWW -- I know you're out there -- won't accuse me of blasphemy. German cartoonist Martin Perscheid drew it... And Agent 6 who sent it to us! So, not my fault...right?!

South African lobby group gives broadcasting exec a wife

Walt's memory goes back a long way. He remembers clearly the events of 1994, when South Africa finally achieved "majority rule" -- read "black rule" -- after years of apartheid. There were people, in those days, who said black Africans were not ready to govern their country. They were not yet "fully evolved", it was said, meaning that they had only recently climbed down out of the trees. People who said such things were called "racists".

But, the "racists" argued, just look at them! Look at how they live! Look at how they dress! Why, their women run around half-naked! The counter-argument was that if the black people were still, errr, underdeveloped, that was the fault of the white oppressors, who failed to understand African customs, and wouldn't recognize that African ways and customs are by no means inferior to those of the "developed" -- read "white" -- peoples.

So, 20 years after becoming "free at last, free at last", the culture and customs of Africa's once-repressed black people are stronger than ever, as witness reports of Hlaudi Motsoeneng's recent visit to South Africa's northern Limpopo province.

Mr. Motsoeneng is the acting COO of SABC, the nation's public broadcaster. He and several other SABC execs went on a little tour of the hinterlands, ostensibly to find out how their programmes were being received by the folks out in the bush. "Not so well", was the answer given by Mudzi wa Vhurereli ha Vhavenda, a lobby group of traditional leaders and healers -- read "witch doctors" -- agitating for more programming in the local Venda language.

The Venda lobby group felt that Mr. Motsoeneng, being a "chef" -- a political appointee -- would probably respond favourably to their requests if he were given something by way of an incentive. So they gave him a bride, Vanessa Mutswari, a human resources management student, aged 22 or 23, depending on which paper you read. They also gave him a cow and a calf.

"We gave him these gifts", said Mudzi executive secretary Humbelani Nemakonde, because "he is committed to his job and understands the strategic objectives of the SABC".

But wasn't the giving of a girl a bit over the top, kind of like sacrificing a virgin? Oh no, Mr. Nemakonde told The Sowetan. "All the girls were there with their parents. Their parents knew what was going to happen and they all agreed." About ten girls were paraded in front of Mr. Motsoeneng bare-breasted, and "he chose the one he liked."

The Commission for Gender Equality said it had received a complaint after news of the Venda group's generosity was published. And the South African women's ministry said it viewed the whole process as an abuse of cultural values. "The use of women as gifts as if they were livestock is a serious regress and an insult to the gains of 20 years of democracy and freedom," its statement ran, "particularly the contribution of women."

SABC spokesthingy Kaizer Kganyago told the BBC he was unaware of the Commission for Gender Equality's investigation and that if it had any issues, they should be taken up with the Venda group concerned. Mr. Motsoeneng himself has not commented, perhaps because he has his mouth full.

Vatican experts verify authenticity of miracle attributed to intercession of Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen

Catholics praying for the beatification of Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen may well offer a prayer of thanks, as a panel of theologians has approved a miracle attributed to his intercession.

The Archbishop Fulton Sheen Foundation announced that the Vatican experts had verified the authenticity of the miracle, which involved the revival of an infant who had appeared to be stillborn. In March, a panel of physicians had found that there was no medical explanation for the child's recovery.

The miracle still requires formal approval from the Congregation for the Causes of Saints. If the Pope Francis then authorizes the release of a decree certifying the miracle, all requirements would be fulfilled for the beatification of Archbishop Sheen. Bishop Daniel Jenky of Peoria IL, Archbishop Sheen's hometown, said that there is "no timeline" for the final Vatican approval of the miracle, or the scheduling of a beatification ceremony. He did say, however, that the beatification would be held in Peoria.

According to Catholic tradition, beatification is the first step on the road to sainthood. Normally -- although it's hard to say what is "normal" at the Vatican these days -- a second miracle is required for canonization.

Canuck cops, paramedics nominated for group Darwin Award

What you see here is the scene of a joint training exercise, held earlier today in Kanata ON, involving the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, the Ottawa Police Department, and a group of "tactical paramedics". The demonstration of "How to make a forced entry into a building" resulted in serious injuries to two of Ottawa's finest and one of the paramedics.

"Forced entries" are any entries that require more than a simple door-opening, of which all police officers are assumed to be capable. If that doesn't work, the "tactical units" -- SWAT teams, if you like -- could use a battering ram or a vehicle to force their way through a barrier. Or they could use a "controlled explosion"...if they knew how to control an explosion, which is what they were supposed to be learning today.

"Tactical paramedics" are trained, in events such as today's, for high-risk scenarios such as executing warrants, scenes where an active shooter is present, or dealing with a hostage-taking. Regular paramedics generally don’t go into these dangerous scenes until police have cleared the affected area, but tactical paramedics follow police in and quickly begin assessing the situation, dealing with injured people they encounter and administering aid.

To provide "a more real-life training experience", police seek out locations with abandoned buildings, such as the one shown, where the property owner allows them to play with fire, possibly in hopes of collecting an insurance settlement. Today's exercise got way too real, as an apparently uncontrolled explosion sent three paramedics and two cops to hospital.

Ottawa police Chief Charles Bordeleau said he couldn't comment on what might have caused the blast, since the training was being conducted under "very stringent safety protocols". The RCMP and Ottawa police are investigating each other, and the Ontario Special Investigations Unit has been called in to investigate the whole lot of them.

Until responsibility for the, errr, unfortunate accident has been properly apportioned, Walt has no choice but to nominate all participants, as a group, for a Darwin Awards Honourable Mention. Well done, those men!

Note to Agent 17: To qualify for a full Darwin Award (with bar), the surivor(s) of an incident such as this must be blown up again... and again... until dead.

Latest on MH370: Inmarsat says search was off target; Canadian ex-pilot blames Malaysian authorities for "bungled inquiry", suggests ulterior motive

Malaysian Airlines flight MH370 vanished on March 8th. Since then, we have learned very little about where it went and what happened to it. Speculation abounds. What we know for sure is that it never arrived at its destination. That's all.

The most probable answer to the question of what happened to MH370 is that it crashed. But where? The official line is that it crashed into the sea -- the Indian Ocean -- but a "premature landing" in the jungles of Malaysia, Thailand, Burma or Yunnan (the southwestern cannot be ruled out. So thick is the canopy of treetops in such places that it's nigh well impossible to see from the air anything more than a blanket of foliage.

The search at sea has concentrated on a small part of the southeastern Indian Ocean off the coast of Perth, Australia. Hopes were raised when "pings" were heard such as might be generated by the aircraft's black boxes. A thorough search by the Bluefin robot sub found nothing, nothing.

Now Inmarsat, the UK satellite company, has told the BBC that the searchers have been looking in the wrong place! Its scientists think the plane more likely crashed in a part of the ocean further to the southwest.

Inmarsat's communications with the aircraft are seen as better clues to the whereabouts of the lost flight than the radar data so far provided by Malaysian or other authorities. The hunt for the lost jet is currently taking a short break while ships map the Indian Ocean floor. When the search resumes, the Inmarsat "hotspot" will be a key focus.

But so too will a number of areas being fed into the investigation by other groups. Australian authorities are expected to announce where these are shortly. Walt is waiting to see if his suggestion that Diego Garcia be looked at will at last be heard. If not, well, I can only cast the pearls...

If they don't listen to Walt, perhaps the "authorities" will have some regard to the opinions of Christopher Goodfellow, a retired businessman and former pilot who lives in Florida. He is a graduate of McGill and Cornell universities and a former director of the Canadian Internet Registration Authority. In ‘A bungled inquiry’: 100 days after MH370 went missing it is clear Malaysia officials hiding information he blames Malaysian officials for mishandling the investigation and for hiding vital information. [You seem to have read the headline thoroughly. Ed.]

Mr. Goodfellow isn't big on the conspiracy theories, preferring to think that the loss of the aeroplane might have been the result of an accident. He wrote about this possibility before, "as a pilot with some knowledge of the issues defending two fellow pilots who were being much maligned and who could not defend themselves."

What is wanted, he continues, is full disclosure by the owners of Malaysian Airlines -- the Malaysian government holds a majority stake --of information about possible causes of such an accident. Mr. Goodfellow would like to know about the cargo MH370 might have been carrying. Walt has seen suggestions ranging from a large quantity of gold -- good reason for a hijacking -- to crates of mangosteens -- not such a good reason.

And what about failure to properly maintain the aircraft or correct deficiencies which caused at least one crash previously? Mr. Goodfellow refers to procedures by which aircraft manufacturers and regulators handle design flaws and other problems revealed by the operation of airliners. Service Bulletins issued by manufacturers, and Airworthiness Directives issued by regulators keep the industry informed.

The Boeing 777 has had its share of such notices. Two in particular are relevant to MH370: one involving a short-circuit in the hose feeding emergency oxygen to the crew, and one warning of possible rupturing of the aircraft pressure vessel due to the mounting of a satellite communications antenna.

The former was responsible for a well-documented accident (fortunately on the ground at Cairo) involving an Egyptair 777. The resultant fire destroyed the cabin and burned a hole through the plane, and would have been catastrophic if it had occurred in mid-air. The satellite antenna issue could also be fatal, tearing the aircraft’s skin and resulting in rapid depressurisation. It is time, Mr. Goodfellow says, for the Malaysian authorities to show that checks and modifications regarding these issues were complied with.

Walt agrees. And if the Malaysian authorities produce logs and records and reports showing that the plane was in tiptop condition, and carrying no dangerous cargo, so much the better, for such disclosure could only reinforce the theory that MH370 was hijacked and taken to parts unknown by ___________ ... you fill in the blank.

FOLLOW-UP - If you're following all the twists and turns in the MH370 saga, you must read "Aussie officials now say maybe MH370 WAS hijacked" (June 30th)

Selling pot to uniformed cop -- dumb... really dumb

Agent 17 sends us yet another example of the kind of mindless stupidity with which an entire sub-class of our "society" seems afflicted. Late on the evening of June 11th, in Panama Beach FL, a local cop was on patrol in an unmarked car, but in full uniform, when he was approached by Terandell Curlee Coleman, pictured.

According to the affidavit of complaint sworn by Lt. John Deegins, while sitting in his parked car, he observed Coleman pushing a baby stroller carrying his two-month-old infant. The officer says Coleman approached him "using slang words indicating he was attempting to sell narcotics."

When Lt. Deegins showed interest, Coleman parked the stroller next to another vehicle about 15 to 20 feet away. He then offered to sell the cop $25 worth of "bud", while displaying "a small clear plastic package containing a green leafy substance appearing to be cannabis." Coleman was then arrested for "possession of cannabis with intent to sell", a misdemeanor.

But the story doesn't end there. Coleman was also charged with felony child neglect for allegedly seeking to conduct a narcotics transaction "while acting as a caregiver" for the baby, who was left attended while he was negotiating with the cop. Coleman is also facing revocation of his release on bond following an arrest earlier this year for burglary.

Coleman is in a heap of trouble, and causing a heap of trouble, albeit of a minor sort. But hey, it's not his fault. He's obviously yet another disadvantaged yoof, the product of American society as we find it after decades of political correctness and the abandonment to government of responsibility for everything. Including Terandell Curlee Coleman.

"You're a heretic!" Greek Orthodox bishops call out Pope Francis

Unafraid to call out the most powerful religious leader in the world, two Greek Orthodox Metropolitan Bishops have had the audacity to say openly what many Catholics -- not just traditionalists -- are thinking. Pope Francis is a heretic!

Who, you may ask, are these non-Catholics to say so? Understand, please, that the Greek Orthodox Church is formally schismatic because they do not accept the decree of Vatican I (the Council of 1870) on the papacy. However, the Greek Orthodox Church is part of the catholic and apostolic Church and is not heretical.

His Eminence, the Metropolitan of Piraeus, Seraphim, and His Eminence, the Metropolitan of Dryinoupolis, Andrew, both of the Church of Greece, declared the Pope (or co-Pope or whatever he is) a heretic because of his false teaching -- neither catholic nor apostolic -- during his first year in office. They wrote a harsh 89-page letter dated 10 April 2014 to the "Head of State of the Vatican City," asking Francis to renounce his "Satanic pride" in teaching and/or supporting five serious heresies:

Syncretism -- the false teaching traditionally condemned by the Catholic and Apostolic Church, that "we all worship the same god, all gods are equal," which the Second Vatican Council repackaged as interfaith "ecumenism". See footnote for comment on Francis' syncretistic sin, committed on Pentecost Sunday.

Homophilia -- a refusal to denounce homosexual acts, which are condemned in the Bible as one of the Four Sins that Cry to Heaven for retribution.

Judaizing -- false teaching on the Jews that departs from the Bible.

Sexual immorality -- Francis' failure to take firm and public action against his clergy's perpetrating grave sins such as paedophilia, likewise condemned in the Bible.

Modernism -- his wholehearted embrace of the Modernist errors of Vatican II, condemned in 1907 by Pope St. Pius X in his encyclical Pascendi.

The letter is addressed to Pope Francis with "sincere love", motivated by the need to remind heretics to return to the one, holy, catholic, and apostolic church. Let us add our prayers to those of the two Metropolitans.

Footnote on the Pope's syncretistic sin: On June 8th, Pentecost Sunday ("the Birthday of the Church"), the Pope astonished and scandalized true Catholics by, for the first time in history, presiding over Muslim prayers and readings from the Qu'ran, in the presence of Muslim (and Jewish) unbelievers, in the Vatican itself! Immediately after so doing, Francis was stricken ill, and had to cancel all meetings scheduled for the following day.

Can we doubt that God is trying to teach the Holy Father that the heresy of syncretism will not go unpunished? Syncretism is a grave sin, condemned by the Catholic Church right up until Vatican II, which repackaged it as "ecumenism". This heresy, which Francis now embraces and promotes, holds that we all worship the same god, and all gods are equal. This is contrary to dogma -- that which the Church has always taught and proclaims to be forever true -- for which the Pope should beg forgiveness of the One True God, whose One True Church which Francis so misleads.