Whatever you do, don't fart!

Bonbshell news from France th is weekend! Late Saturday night, a 24-year-old man was rushed to the Rangueil Accident and Emergency unit in Toulouse,  "in a state of extreme discomfort, having inserted a large object up his rectum.’ 

An evacuation of the hospital was ordered with seconds, when the large object was discovered to be a World War I artillery shell, still live after all these years. A spokesthing for the authorities told the meeja "Emergency surgery was carried out, and the object was found to be an artillery shell dating back to the First World War. Worse still, it had not exploded, and so bomb disposal experts had to be called to diffuse the shell, with the fire brigade standing by."

Staff and patients were evacuated and a security perimeter was set up around the accident and emergency unit, before the pointed 1918 shell, which was almost 8 inches long and just over an inch in circumference, was declared safe.

The patient, a French national, was set to be interviewed by police this week. Inspector Clouseau of the Toulouse gendarmerie said prosecutors were contemplating legal action against the patient for "handling 'category A munitions."

There was no initial explanation as to why the shell ended up in the man’s body, but local media speculated that "it might have had something to do with his social life."

La Dépêche newspaper writes that medical staff in Toulouse are "accustomed to treating victims injured during sexual games." Shells such as the one found in the patient's nether regions turn up regularly in the fields of France in the so-called "Iron Harvest"’ – the annual collection of often unexploded ordnance from the two world wars found on farmland, building sites, and other disrupted land.

VIDEO: Latest from Waifu Amelia: Is YOUR job safe?

Once again, our AI darling, Waifu Amelia, says out loud what people are thinking, not just in No-longer-great Britain, but in all the AABC countries. Walt knows you're looking! Listen up!

Did you notice that the barmaid says "ma'er" for "matter"? That's an example of the glottal stop which is a hallmark of Essex English. That's the kind of English which David Beckham speaks -- a blend of traditional Cockney and Received Pronunciation.

Common throughout southeast England, the glottal stop in Essex English is a prominent feature of the Estuary English dialect, where the voiceless plosive /t/ sound is replaced by a closure of the vocal cords, particularly in the middle or at the end of words. 

t is often heard in words like "bottle" ("bo'el") or "that" ("tha'"). It grates on American and Canadian ears -- or Walt's at least -- but we'll give Amelia and her friends a pass, since Essex English is much easier to listen to than Bombay or Karachi English!

Neologisms of the year

No, this isn't a Wally award, although we do admit we wish we'd thought of it. Credit to the loony lefties at the Washington Post.

And credit (limit $1.98) also to the snowbound scamp, Agent 34.

VIDEO: TEDx talk about why Indians are shitting on our beaches

Agent 3 has a friend who has a rather posh cottage property on the shore of Lake Erie, not far from the US-Canada border. The friend has been complaining to the local council for years now about visitors from south Asia shitting on the beach. 

In spite of being shown not just photos but videos of brown people depositing their calling cards in the golden sand, council refuses to act, for fear of being called racist. Some liberal-minded folk (read: idiots) have even played the DEI card, arguing that open defecation is part of the culture of the shitters, and their culture must be respected. After all, "diversity is our strength", right?

In this TEDx Talk, given in 2015, Sangita Vyas, a grarduate of the University of Pennsylvania and Princeton, shares the little understood reality of open defecation in India. Most of the open defecation in the world happens in India, yet social scientists and the government claim not to understand why.

Ms Vyas did a country-wide survey and came up with some answers to the eternal question of "WHY?" Spoiler alert: It's because of their culture and their heathen religion. Can you say "caste", boys and girls? I knew you could. But good on Ms Vyas for saying the quiet part out loud.

In her talk, given just over 10 years ago., Ms Vyas expresses the hope that as the modern generation becomes better-educated (and richer!) things will change. They have not. 

And the millions of Indians who come to Canada and the USA on the invitation of our liberal governments bring their millennia-old cultural and religious practices with them. As they say themselves, "You can take the Indian out of India, but you can't take Indis out of the Indian." 

Thanks to an anonymous member of the BCF community for showing us this video.

VIDEO: A word from our sponsor

From the Babylon Bee, of course!

Just how cold IS it?

Walt's fingers are too cold to type, and Ed.'s are too cold to do whatever he does, so...

Canucks are ready for the invasion!