"You are powerless against my assault rosary!!!"

Earlier this month, The Atlantic, which used to be a reasonably fair journal of opinion*, published "How Extremist Gun Culture Is Trying to Co-opt the Rosary", by one a self-described "online hate researcher" -- an "expert" no doubt -- by the name of Daniel Panetton. That the original title was "How the Rosary became an extremist symbol" tells you all ye need to know about the biases of the author.

In "Of 'rad-trad' Catholics, 'battle beads' and belly laughs", our old friend Rex Murphy, who was raised Catholic but is by no meands one of us "Trads", calls the piece "the funniest thing I've read in decades...[in] the tradition of National Lampoon or Mad Magazine...a scream from beginning to end."

Mr Murphy writes:  A few minutes later, after composing myself, I read the article’s first sentence: "Just as the AR-15 rifle has become a sacred object for Christian nationalists in general, the Rosary has acquired a militaristic meaning for radical-traditional (or 'rad trad') Catholics."

Almost as good is that sly dig at "Christian nationalists" (they may even exist -- I won’t contest it) for whom "the AR-15 has become a sacred object." Another luminously funny revelation. The AR-15 -- sacred? Is it only that munition? Or do the 12-gauge shotgun, the .30-30 Winchester and the humble .22 exert an equal sacerdotal aura? I expect to this author they do, but like all great humorists he doesn’t overload (a useful verb here) his exposition."

He concludes: ...watch out for those rad-trad Rosary-toting Catholic nationalists. They may be hiding a print of The Lord's Prayer in their ammunition case.

The Babylon Bee "your trusted source of Christian satire", takes up the cudgels with "Catholics Unveil High-Capacity Assault Rosary" Here's part of their tongue-in-cheek report.

Pope Francis issued a papal bull Thursday authorizing the production of a new HM-18X Assault Rosary. The pope detailed key features of the innovative new rosary in his edict, including rapid-fire decades, an extended crucifix clip, and a laser sight....

"For centuries the holy rosary has been our greatest and most stylish tool to fight evil," said Pope Francis during morning mass in St. Peter's Basilica. "But the time has come for more aggressive spiritual warfare to fight evil climate change and protect marginalized communities." 

"Oh, and serve God," he quickly added.

Swiss Guards deployed in Vatican City have advised Catholics not to aim the new rosary at anyone they do not wish to bless.... A pew research study indicates conservative Catholics have latched onto the new rosary, impressed by how many prayers they can shoot off in five minutes. Liberal Catholics are dismayed at what they see as "too much prayer" and are currently advocating for common sense rosary reform.

And finally... a little-known (to Walt, until now) blog called The American Catholic reposted "Assault Rosaries Banned In Virginia" a piece by Guy McClung, first published over a year ago... as satire!

A couple of quotes: The photo above is of a United States government issued “combat rosary” supplied to U.S. soldiers in WW I. They were made of chain and some – the more “deadly” versions – included a miraculous medal and a St. Benedict medal].

"Our law enforcement personnel and national guard troops have done a fantastic job," said Virginia Governor Shearing Northcut following this weekend's raids on homes, churches, and businesses across the state. "In a short 36 hour period, they found and confiscated over 40,000 of the rosary hate weapons. They will all be destroyed."

One state senator, who asked to remain anonymous, told this reporter, "It just makes common sense. No one needs to say 53 of the same prayer or even 6 of the same prayer, over and over. It is in the interest of all the people that these chains or necklaces or whatever they are be limited by law."

In his update, Mr McClung writes: I am working on a new prophecy: "Vatican Bans Assault Bibles; Democrats Exalt."

[That's enough parodies of an article that parodies itself. Ed.]

* Until they started giving space to the TDS-challenged cuckservative, David Frum.

Memorare

Screen shot from the Rosary in Latin Prayer Room, where the Holy Rosary is prayed in Latin, live streaming 24/7 for constant prayer, in community with others at the same time all over the world. How powerful! May God be praised now and forever!

VIDEO: The world needs a Marian "Blue Wave"

This past October 13th was the 102nd anniversary of the final Apparition of the Blessed Virgin Mary at Fatima. In a two-minute video published two days earlier, Very Rev. Joseph Strickland, Bishop of Tyler TX, issued a call to participate in what he calls a "Marian blue wave". Bishop Strickland describes this as "a refocus on the beautiful gift of the Rosary, and the call to prayer that the Blessed Virgin Mary has given us so many times."

"The Rosary is a rather simple prayer," said the prelate, "repeating a basic message of devotion to our Lord Jesus Christ, seeking the will of the Father, and asking Mary to intercede for us, the people of God.... We pray for the sanctity of life, from conception to natural death, and we pray for healing in the world and the Church at this time."



Our Lady of Fatima, pray for us!

VIDEO: First Canadian Rosary Bowl to be held in Ottawa, August 22nd

Here's a heads-up for our Canadian Catholic readers! Keep the afternoon of Thursday, August 22nd clear for the first Rosary Bowl ever to be held in Canada, at TD Place in Ottawa.

What's a Rosary Bowl? And why is this one being held then and there? Dennis and Angelina Girard, founders of the Marian Devotional Movement, told LifeSite News that in 2017, the centenary of the Apparitions of Our Lady of Fatime, they vowed to restore devotion to the Rosary, following in the footstepts of Father Luc Desilets.

On Ascension eve in 1867, Fr Desilets went into the stone chapel at Cap-de-la-Madeleine, Québec, and found, to his horror, a pig beside the altar munching on a rosary. As M Girard relates the story, the young parish priest "picked up the mangled rosary, shooed the pig out of the chapel and said, 'Men have dropped the rosary and the swine have picked it up.'" Five years after making a vow to restore devotion to the Rosary in his parish, and re-establish enrollment in the Confraternity of the Holy Rosary, he had enrolled 3000 souls, and the parish that was dead, with a pig chewing a rosary, became too small for the number of parishioners.

The Rosary Bowl is the public recitation of the Rosary. As well, there will be brief remarks by Most Rev. Terrence Prendergast, Archbishop of Ottawa, and Bishop Pierre-Olivier Tremblay of Trois-Rivières QC.

The site is the stadium formerly known as Lansdowne Park, now called TD place, the home stadium for the Canadian Football League's Ottawa Redblacks. That wasn't the original plan! When the Girards were organizing a five-day pilgrimage from Ottawa to the Marian shrine at Cap-de-la-Madeleine, home of the miraculous statue of Our Lady of the Cape, who also bears the title of Our Lady of the Rosary, they planned only that pilgrims would visit the stadium which was the site of the massive five-day 1947 Marian Congress, when Canada's bishops consecrated the country to the Immaculate Heart of Mary.

The Girards envisioned pilgrims strolling the grounds and comparing it to a photo of the historic Congress, which was attended by more than 1.5 million pilgrims, and numerous prelates, including Francis Cardinal Spellman of New York and József Cardinal Mindszenty of Hungary. But then the VP of communications for TD Place suggested the Girards actually use the stadium. "I can give you the field for free between 2 and 3, on the feast of the Queenship of Mary," he told them.

"Can you imagine?" said M Girard. "We’ve got this hour window on the feast of the Queenship of Mary, where we're coming to pray the rosary. We are returning to the exact holy ground where our country was consecrated to the Immaculate Heart of Mary in 1947 and we're bringing a Pilgrim Statue of Our Lady of the Cape. And, of course, it's just a few weeks before the federal election as well, so we know Our Lady has orchestrated this, because we sure didn’t plan it."

"In the Catechism of the Catholic Church 1432," M Girard told LifeSite News, "you find out that conversion is first the work of God, and He does it by pouring grace on hardened hearts, so we need more grace. That's the idea, getting everybody to enroll, so you can unleash this torrent of grace upon the policy makers. And in a devotional sense, you can't beat a whole flock of people, the whole church, praying the Rosary together."

Click here for more information on the Rosary Bowl and the pilgrimage to Cap-de-la-Madeleine. And yes, we have a short (59-second) video. Here it is.



We encourage our readers -- not just Canadians but Americans and anyone who can get there -- to attend the Rosary Bowl (it's FREE) and other pilgrimage events. You will surely receive many graces for doing so, and it's just possible that your prayers may help Canada, which desperately needs conversion to turn away from the secular humanism espoused by its nominally Catholic prime minister, and turn back to God and the Christian values on which the country was built.

Fatima Rosary Rally, Toronto Airport Sheraton, April 20th

Yesterday I told a reader in Uzbekistan -- no kidding -- that, now that the conclave is over, I probably wouldn't be writing too much about the affairs of the Church, unless the Holy Father drops some kind of bombshell on us. Such as a return to Traditional Catholicism.

Not much chance of that. I note with dismay that Pope Francis is to be "installed", not consecrated or crowned as tradition demands. Nor could he be anything other than "installed", since he, like Benedict XVI, was never consecrated as a bishop, merely "installed" according to the Protestant-style "New Ordinal" of 1969.

I note with even more dismay that, for the new Pope's first Mass, the Protestant picnic table was returned to its place of dishonour in the Sistine Chapel, concealing the beauty of Michelangelo's inspired art. And the message of his "homily" was hardly even Christian. What Francis told the Cardinals was that the Church should not -- repeat, not -- try to impose its message on a modern society that doesn't want to hear it. The Church needs to be "one with the people". In other words, the Faith should be made to conform to popular sentiment, rather than ask the faithful to conform to the Truth revealed by God.

So... going by first impressions, I'd say the outlook for a revival of the Faith of our Fathers is pretty gloomy. But we can hope. And we can pray! Good Catholics in the Toronto area -- and let's not forget Buffalo! -- are encouraged to attend a Fatima Rosary Rally, sponsored by the Fatima Center, to be held at the Sheraton Toronto Airport Hotel & Conference Centre on Saturday, April 20th, beginning at 12:30 p.m.

The Miraculous Pilgrim Virgin Statue of Our Lady of Fatima -- blessed by Pope Paul VI -- will be present. Father Nicholas Gruner, "the Fatima Priest", will speak, as will Walt's old friend John Vennari, editor of Catholic Family News.

You will have an opportunity to be enrolled -- with your family members if you wish -- in the Brown Scapular, Our Lady's protection in these dangerous times. Sacramentals and literature on the Message of Fatima will be available. Admission is free, and the benefits and graces to be obtained many.

For more information or directions to the Sheraton Toronto Airport Hotel & Conference Centre, call the Fatima Center, toll-free, 1-800-845-3047. Tell them  you read about the rally in Walt Whiteman's World!

MA town bans Rosary rally which "might offend someone"

The Boston Herald reports that the selectmen (town council) of tiny Upton MA refused permission for residents to organize a Rosary vigil on the town common.

Selectmen Jim Pickard and Jim Brochu -- religious affiliations unknown -- said that they declined a request from a local resident, Michael Casey, because they feared some residents might be offended by the prayer rally. The selectmen attempted to justify their decision by citing the constitutional “separation of church and state”.

The rally went ahead anyway, outside St. Gabriel's Roman Catholic church. Walt wonders what would have happened had the parish priest attempted to say Mass on the common. "Mass not allowed in Mass."?