Out of the Great Not-so-white North comes news of shocking Canadian depravity, and not-so-shocking government interference in freedom of speech.
Apparently there are porn channels on Canuck cable TV. Who knew??!! Like all emissions -- nocturnal and otherwise -- the programming on such channels is subject to regulation by the Canadian Radio-Television and Telecommunications Commission (CRTC). [We'll skip the French version. Ed.] And the CRTC is concerned that "AOV XXX Action Clips" and "AOV Maleflixxx" may not be airing enough Canadian content. Even worse, they don't have closed captioning! The CRTC X-rated specialty channels are supposed to air 35% Canadian programming over the broadcast year, and 90% of the content should have captioning.
No closed captioning on the gentlemen's flickers. Makes you think, doesn't it. How would those captions read?
"Mmmmmmmmmmmmm... ooooooooooooooohhhhhhhh... aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh.... more, more, more!"
[That's enough closed captioning. Ed.]
As for the CanCon, Walt wonders how the CRTC distinguishes between blue movies ["yellow movies" in China. Ed.] made in Canada and those made in, say, the Excited States of America. Would there be erotic rubbing of noses? Would the Canadian actors have little maple leaves tattooed on their naughty bits? Would [That's enough examples. Ed.]
As part of proposed licence renewals, the commission plans to hear evidence on the apparent non-compliance. Meetings will be held behind closed doors, in darkened rooms with sticky floors, and are expected to last an entire Arctic night.
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