There was this loving grandfather who always made a special effort to spend time with his son's family on weekends. Every Saturday morning he would take his 5-year-old granddaughter out for a drive in the car for some quality time -- pancakes, ice cream, candy-- just him and his granddaughter.
One particular Saturday, however, he had a terrible cold and could not get out of bed. He knew his granddaughter always looked forward to their drives and would be very disappointed. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and said that she would take their granddaughter for her weekly drive and breakfast.
When they returned, the little girl anxiously ran upstairs to see her grandfather who was still in bed. "Well, did you enjoy your ride with Grandma?" he asked.
"Not really, Grandpa. It was boring. We didn't see a single asshole, queer, piece of shit, horse's ass, socialist left wing Obama-lover, blind bastard, dip shit, Muslim camel-humper, peckerhead or son-of-a-bitch anywhere we went. We just drove around and Grandma smiled at everyone she saw. I really didn't have any fun."
Thanks and a tip o' the toque to seldom-heard-from Agent 2.
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