Where's Walt(o) now? Notes from Ed.

Ed. here. Walt has left me to shovel out our cabin in the pines while he is at an undisclosed location in the Great No-longer-white North. Tomorrow night he and Poor Len Canayen and two of Walt's trusted agents will sit in the middle of a large room, surrounded by TVs and computers, tracking and discussing the returns from the Canadian federal election. Many a good time will be had by all. Or not, as the case may be.

Walt has predicted the result of said election. He thinks Trudeaumania II will produce a Liberal minority. (Lifetime pct .976.) The Liberal minority, he says, will have been elected by the visible minorities of Canada's three big metropolitan areas: Vancouver, Montréal and, above all, Toronto.

The Canadian press -- not to be confused with Canadian Press -- labour under the delusion that their endorsements matter. The Toronto Star endorsed Justin Trudeau's Liberals. No surprise there, the Red Star being so liberal, so PC as to make any other endorsement impossible. La Presse, of Montréal, also chooses le Parti Libéral, for reasons which make sense in that city.

The oddest endorsement of this election -- perhaps of this century, so far -- comes from the good grey Globe and Mail. The Glob's editor, David Walmsley, is an Ulsterman, who could hardly be expected to plump for either M Trudeau or Mr Mulcair, both Cafeteria Catholics. But he couldn't bring himself to stand up for the dictatorial Steve Harper, so penned a leader calling on Canadians to vote for the Conservatives, on condition that Mr. Harpoon resign immediately after winning!

No, dear reader, Ed. kids you not. See "Globe and Mail mocked on Twitter after endorsing Tories but not Harper". Mr. Walmsley evidently thinks it possible to suck and blow at the same time. Best Tweet: "I endorse the Globe but not the Mail." Poor Len's comment: "It's like calling the Montréal Canadiens to win the Stanley Cup, providing they trade Carey Price for Jonathan Bernier." (Canuck readers will doubtless understand that one.)

Speaking of les Glorieux, with last night's victory over Detroit, they have now won the first six games of the new season, the best start in the history of the club. Sadly, the very fine game was once again not available to Francophone (= French-speaking) fans residing west of Québec who don't subscribe to Robbers ridiculously expensive NHL Centre Ice package.

The game was telecast, in English, on Hockey Night in Canada on the CBC, with the Toronto game relegated to CITY. But the TVA coverage, which should have been on "Le forfait en français", was not. Channels 423 and 424 were dark, once again. See "Canada's team MIA from 'Hockey Night in Canada'" (WWW 11/10/15). If you're a Bell customer and subscribe to the "NHL French package", complain!

That's it from this corner of the woods. Walt will return on Tuesday, or possibly Wednesday depending on how long it takes him to dry out.

Canada's team MIA from "Hockey Night in Canada"

Poor Len Canayen here. It's the eve of Canadian Thanksgiving and I'm NOT giving thanks to Canada's sports media for discriminating against Canada's team in the National [sic] Hockey League, the Montréal Canadiens.

For over sixty years, Hockey Night in Canada, has been a must-watch programme on CBC. Indeed, it's probably the only programme that over a million Canadians watch with any regularity. Last night was the first Saturday of the NHL's 2015-16 season, with all seven Canadian teams in action. Le Canadien -- the only team with fans right across Canada, from Squamish to Dildo, were playing at Boston. But which two games did HNIC treat viewers to? Ottawa at Toronto, and... wait for it... Edmonton at Nashville!

The Ottawa v Toronto game wasn't bad, featuring a remarkable comeback by the Leafs to force a shoot-out, which they lost. But the Edmonton v Nashville match-up was by all accounts a total snorefest. The game at Boston, however, was more of a slugfest -- traditional when the Habs meet the Bruins -- with 20 minutes in penalties and two goals in the final minute. Les Glorieux emerged triumphant, 4-2.

So how come Canadian viewers didn't get to see that? I will explain... and condemn! Back in 2014, the NHL (G. Bettman, Prop.) sold the Canadian TV rights to Canada's biggest cable company, Robbers [Rogers, surely! Ed.], which thus acquired HNIC. The CBC, faced with the loss of its top revenue generator, grovelled abjectly enough to be given a "lease" on the Saturday night staple, but Rogers retained control of the property, which it also distributes on its own City-TV channels.

We're not just talking English TV here. Robbers also got the rights to all French programmes, which it divided between TVA and RDS, with Société Radio-Canada left out of the picture. That didn't really matter, since SRC had ceded the estimable Soirée du Hockey to RDS years ago. However, with Robbers controlling distribution, the French channels, which had previously been available right across the Great Not-so-white North, have been blacked out everywhere west of Québec and a small chunk of eastern Ontario.

It gets worse. Rogers -- greedy bastards that they are -- forced Bell, which distributes TV signals by satellite and fibre-optic cable, to go along with its national/regional lineup, all designed to force subscribers to pay an extra over C$200 per season for an "all hockey all the time" package called NHL Centre Ice.

1000s of Canadiens fans west of Québec (most of whom can understand at least some French) refused, and were belatedly offered what Bell/Rogers call the "NHL French package" for only C$60. For that, you're supposed to be able to get all... all... of the Habs games on TVA and RDS, on two channels featuring "Le forfait LNH en français". Was the Montréal game on either of those channels last night? Err, no. Was any game shown? Err, no. The "LNH gratuit" appeared to be a CCTV video of the inside of a coal bin at midnight.

Having complained to Bell and got no satisfaction, I am now going to fire a rocket in the direction of the CRTC. And to Robbers, which has put all its HNIC eggs in the Maple Laffs basket, I say: I hope you lose your blue shirts!

Open letter to Rogers, Bell TV, TVA, RDS and the NHL (attn G. Bettman)

Chers espèces de crotte!

I, Poor Len Canayen, am a fan of the Montréal Canadiens. If I can't go to their games in person, I would watch them on TV...if only I could!

But I live in western Canada -- "western" meaning anywhere west of Québec and the easternmost corner of Ontario. Until this season, that didn't matter. I was able to watch all the Habs games on RDS, and enjoy the superior commentary of their play-by-play team and analysts.

During this summer, though, you, Rogers, made a deal with the so-called National Hockey League (G. Bettman, prop. -- a man who knows nothing about hockey but everything about sharp business deals) by which you, Rogers, got the exclusive rights to broadcast the NHL in Canada.

So you, Rogers, greedy bastards that you are, figured out a way to make little people, like me, pay more to see our favourite team. You reduced drastically the number of Habs games telecast in English on Hockey Night in Canada on Saturdays or Hometown Hockey on Sundays. And you divided up the French telecasts between RDS and TVA.

No problem... or so I thought, as I signed up for Bell TV's "Le monde en français" satellite package. But whoooaaaa... You, Rogers and Bell, have colluded to block the RDS and TVA Sports channels in western Canada (see definition above) only and always when the Montréal games are on!

The object, obviously, is to force me to sign up for your premium "NHL Centre Ice" package, a snip at only C$209 for "the year". (What does that mean? My prediction is that it means "until the end of the regular season", when subscribers will be asked to pay still more if they want to see the playoffs.)

Guess what, greedheads?! I won't do it! I cancelled my subscription to "Le monde en français" and I'll be double damned if I'll sign up for anything else. In fact, I have a good mind to switch to cable TV -- not Rogers! -- and be done forever with Bell's intermittent satellite signals.

To Rogers, Bell and the NHL -- I'm not including RDS and TVA because it's not their fault -- PUCK YOU! Puck you very much!

c.c. Government of Canada Competition Bureau, Canadian Human Rights Commission