Canadian election... as the Babylon Bee saw it

Canucks know that theirs is a nitwit country. But do they care? Evidently not. They proved it again yesterday. Gotta love those simple frostbacks, eh!

Note from Ed.: I finally figured out how to add a link to a picture. Click on the photo to read the Bee's article.

Canadian election: Best comment seen on "X" so far

Canadian election: What hath Trump wrought?!

Ed. here. Walt has been texting one- and two-liners by phone from the Great No-longer-white North. If I wait until I put them into a coherent narrative you won't see anything until Wednesday, so I'll just copy his notes voets stoets.

- TDS drives "progressive: voters from the fringes to the less-loony Liberals. 

- Pinko socialist vote collapses. NDP leader Jugmeat Singh loses  his seat, resigns as leader of the Few Democrats..

- Standings as of this writing (see timestamp): Liberals elected or leading in 168 ridings, Conservatives 144, Bloc Québécois 23, NDP 7, Greens 1 ("May? Party of one?")

- Counting of ballots halted in wee hours, just like Philadelphia. Will resume at 0930 EDT.

- Assuming no change, it's a Liberal minority government. Separatist Blocheads hold the balance of power.

- Widespread fraud alleged in Sikh majority ridings in Brampton ON and suburban Vancouver BC. 1000s of Sikhs allowed to vote; citizenship not questioned.

- "Indo-Canadians" win dozens of seats in BC, ON, and Alberta.

- Cuckservative leader Pierre Poilievre declared defeated in his own riding at 0443 EDT. 91 candidates on the ballot there in chaos orchestrated by advocates of proportional representation.

- Most incumbent cabinet ministers re-elected. Carnage cabinet will be same as Trudeau's, as they rearrange the deck chairs.

- Demented Joe Biden (or someone typing for him) goes on social media to congratulate Carnage on win for "liberal values".

- Southwestern Ontario, where they make all the cars Trump wants to tariffs, goes solidly Conservative in spite of union endorsements of NDP. Workers ignore union leadership.

- In victory speech, Carney sez, "Trump is trying to break us so that America can own us. That will never, that will never ever happen. But…we also must recognize the reality that our world has fundamentally changed." Well, duh!

That's all we have for you as dawn comes up like thunder over our cabin in the pines. Maybe there'll be more after Walt wakes up.

An accident like this could never happen in the Canadian navy

Even as we speak, America's frost-backed neighbours to the north are voting in a federal election of more than the usual significance. As they headed to the polls, President Trump reiterated for the umpteenth time his suggestion that Canadians and their nitwit country would be better off as the 51st of the Disunited States of America.

On Truth Social today he wrote,  "Elect the man [meaning himself!] who has the strength and wisdom to cut your taxes in half, increase your military power, for free, to the highest level in the World, have your Car, Steel, Aluminum, Lumber, Energy, and all other businesses, QUADRUPLE in size, WITH ZERO TARIFFS OR TAXES, if Canada becomes the cherished 51st. State of the United States of America.

"Look how beautiful this land mass would be. Free access with NO BORDER. ALL POSITIVES WITH NO NEGATIVES. IT WAS MEANT TO BE! America can no longer subsidize Canada with the Hundreds of Billions of Dollars a year that we have been spending in the past. It makes no sense unless Canada is a State!" 

Walt has highlighted the part about military power because we saw a demonstration today of the power of the new US Woke Forces. Britbart News featured this headline:

U.S. Warplane Falls Off Aircraft Carrier into Red Sea 

It seems that earlier today a multi-million-dollar warplane fell off the aircraft carrier USS Harry S. Truman into the Red Sea. The accident that injured one sailor, the Navy said. A tractor that was towing the fighter plane — a model that cost $67 million in 2021 — also slipped off the ship into the sea. 

"The F/A-18E was actively under tow in the hangar bay when the move crew lost control of the aircraft. The aircraft and tow tractor were lost overboard," the Navy said in a statement. "Sailors towing the aircraft took immediate action to move clear of the aircraft before it fell overboard. All personnel are accounted for, with one sailor sustaining a minor injury." 

The carrier and its other planes remain in action and the incident is under investigation, the Navy added. No details of recovery work were released, nor was anything said about the race, religion or sexual orientation of the sailors involved in the incident.

Walt humbly suggests that the Canucks stay with the weak little armed forces they have. Something like this could never befall the plane (note the singular) on board the HMCS Jean Chrétien, pictured below.

Meanwhile, back in the auld sod

In Eire, Easter Week is traditionally marked by Republicans with parades and marches commemorating the 1916 Rising against British rule. The tradition has now been adopted by Ireland's fast-growing anti-immigration movement/

Outside Dublin's Gardens of Remembrance, tens of thousands of anti-immigration marchers gathered for their largest protest yet. Speaking of the Irish government, an older woman carrying a commenorative wreath ranted, "They need to be dragged out by their balls!"

In the Republic, though very much not in Northern Ireland, Sinn Féin voters are by far the strongest anti-immigration constituency. Scattered across a broad spectrum of microparties, Ireland's anti-immigration movement achieved electoral success last year only in winning council seats in working-class areas of Dublin. 

Judging by the fiery speeches, the protest's organisers have decided to lean strongly into capturing Sinn Féin’s disaffected urban voter base. "We don’t need big posh people to come on and represent the working class," independent candidate Gavin Pepper roared at the vast crowd outside the grand neoclassical Custom House. “"We are the working class."

Myles naGopaleen, God rest him, always referred to them as "the plain people of Ireland". Speaking for them, he would surely have used a richer epithetn that "big posh people". He might well have called them "that ignorant, self-opinionated, sod-minded, suet-brained, ham-faced, mealy-mouthed, streptococcus-ridden gang of naatural gobdaws!" Myles was never one to sugar-coat things.

Neither is newly-elected councillor Patrick Quinlan of the National Party, an identitarian movement standing on a platform of mass deportations and re-Gaelicising Ireland. He gave a speech railing against "the den of rats inside Dáil Éireann" (the Irish parliament). It was the sort of political speech that would be recognisable to historians of Ireland’s 19th-century mass movement nationalism. :They fear not chaos but our awakening," Quinlan roared, "The holy fire that blazed in our patriot dead…lives on here today. The heroes of 1916 triumphed, and so shall we."

Source (excepting the paragraph of remarks by Myles na Gopaleen): UnHerd 27/4/2025. Thanks to BCF for pointing us in the right direction. If you want to read more of Myles' tales of the plain people of Ireland, try to find a copy of The Best of Myles, Picador Books, 1968.

Also recommended: The Rising: Ireland: Easter 1916, by Fearghal McGarry, Oxford University Press, 2010, and of course the excellent (except for Julia Roberts' performance) movie, Michael Collins (1996).

Canucks, read before you vote! Another warning about Mark Carney

It is now less than 24 hours before Canadians go to the polls to elect a new (Conservative) government (as Walt recommends) or re-elect a tired, old (Liberal) one. 

Walt apologize for not having written more about the 2025 election. It seemed as if not many of our readers were interested. Sleepwalking towards a fate worse than becoming the 51st state. In a last-minute effort to warn Canucks of the danger of voting to re-elect Blackie McBlackface's chosen successor, I refer you to Canada's Greatest Crook: How Canada Was Sold Without a Vote, by Adrian C. Spitters, CFP®.  

Mr Spitters is not just a CFP®  but, as his writings reveal, a gold bug, but that's OK because in his article, he is right on target about the Liberals' "five-year plan of deception, offshore manoeuvres, and political installation executed without consent to erase Canadian sovereignty." You need a LinkedIn account to follow the link, so, for those who don't have such, here are the key points. The emphasis is Walt's.

As Canadian citizens, we are terrified that after nearly a decade of Justin Trudeau dismantling our nation from within, his replacement has already been chosen. 

Not by the people. Not by voters. But by his globalist allies at the World Economic Forum and the central banking cartel that pulls their strings. That man is Mark Carney. And if you thought Trudeau was bad, Carney is the endgame. 

We warned about this. As co-authors of the number one international best-selling book, It Starts With Gold, we laid out how Carney was not rising; he was being installed. Groomed by financial elites to take down Canada from within, his backers include the World Economic Forum, global banking syndicates, and supranational asset managers who treat sovereign nations as investment vehicles. 

[This] is not a theory. It is a calculated series of events that have unfolded with surgical precision over five years.... [Canada has] a massive trade surplus. We are rich in gold, water, oil, timber, and uranium. And yet, we are drowning in debt, told to eat bugs, and scolded for using gas-powered vehicles. 

From Trudeau to Carney: Phase One Ends, Phase Two Begins Why? Because this is no longer about left versus right. This is globalism versus sovereignty. Control versus freedom. And Trudeau was just phase one. Phase two is Carney. The media will push him. The corporations will back him. And the same voters who fell for Trudeau’s smile may fall again for Carney’s credentials. 

We are here to issue one final warning. If Carney remains Prime Minister, we are not just losing a government. We are losing Canada.

UPDATED: Vancouver motor manslaughter the work of a madman?

Canada has a large and vibrant Filipino community. Hundreds of thousands of Pinoys and Pinays have immigrated in recent years, settling mostly in larger cities Vancouver in the west to Toronto in the east. They are not "refugees" or asylum-seekers, but economic migrants, who came to Canada in search of a better life.

The Filipino community is largely peaceful. They are too busy working to cause trouble, and, being mostly Catholic, they haven't brought with them any religious or political strife from their homeland. When they're not working (typically in service industries like hospitality and health care), they love to take part in fiestas. Singing, dancing and street food are a major part of Filipino culture.

Filipinos are regarded by other Canadians as "good immigrants". There is almost no anti-Filipino sentiment in Canada. So most Canadians will be shocked, when they wake up this morning, to hear that a ramming attack on the Lapuj-Lapu street festival in Vancouver BC killed at least nine people, and injured scores of other party-goers.

Interim Vancouver Police Chief Steve Rai says a 30-year-old Vancouver man has been arrested for the early-morning attack in which an SUV plowed through a crowded South Vancouver street at high speed. The exact number of casualties won’t be released until families have been notified.

Vancouver police say on "X" that they are "confident" the incident was not an act of terrorism. How so? And why did Chief Rai say nothing about the identity of the perp now held in custody. [He hasn't been released on bail yet? Ed.] His citizenship status (if any) and ethnicity have not been revealed. Nor has his religion. He might well be a white, born-in-Canada Quaker. That's why we haven't put up the usual "Allahu akbar!" headline... yet.

UPDATED ADDED at 1138: 

In a presser at 0930 PDT, a spokesthingy for the Vancouver police said "I can tell you that the person we have in custody does have a significant history of interactions with police and health-care professionals related to mental health."

A video clip seen on network TV shows a young white man with curly blonde hair sitting up on a gurney as he was loaded into an ambulance. There was no voice-over but we infer he's the allegedly mentally disturbed individual who was behind the wheel. 

So: white, Canadian-born (likely), but probably not a Quaker. That's 2 out of 3. We're now down to a mass killing by a lone wolf -- one of the many individuals with "issues" loose on our streets. That's our sick society. Does any "leader" have a plan to address this problem? Anyone? ... ... ...

FURTHER UPDATE ADDED at 1850:

Whoa! The name of the "suspect"  now charged with eight (count `em, 8) counts of second-degree murder is Kai-Ji Adam Lo. Not white, and possibly not Canadian-born. Try Chinese. When things like this happened in southeast Asia in the days of the Empire, we used to say that someone of the Asian persuasion had "run amok". Now we just say they "have issues".