Time to start teaching the 3 R's again: Walt's suggestion

"The most dispiriting VIDEO I've seen in years", posted last Sunday, demonstrated the ignorance of some young (Gen-Z) Americans of arithmetic, geography, and history. If, as it seems, they are typical products of American education, I would guess they spent few (if any) hours studying reading, writing and spelling. I would be surprised if any of them could write a simple sentence without making errors of spelling and grammar. 

When I went to school [just after the earth's crust cooled. Ed.], we were taught to spell, from grades 1 through 8. Every Friday we had a spelling test, and if you couldn't pass those and other tests of literacy, you were "held back", or, in some places, "failed".

I think it's high time that American (and Canadian) schools resumed the teaching of the 3 R's -- readin', writin' and `rithmetic -- if they can find any teachers who are competent in these subjects. And I think spelling should be taught again. I suggest holding spelling bees at the local, state and national levels, with prizes for those who can spell "antidisestablishmentarianism" (that was worth $12,000 back in 1955) and other words now considered too difficult for American students.

I will go further, by publishing "The Dream of a Spelling Bee", a poem by Charles C. Bombaugh*, which could be used as the ultimate spelling test. The winner would be the one who could transcribe the text, from a recording, with the fewest mistakes.

Menageries where sleuth-hounds caracole,

    Where jaguar phalanx and phlegmatic gnu

Fright ptarmigan and kestrels cheek by jowl,

    With peewit and precocious cockatoo.

Gaunt seneschals, in crotchety cockades,

    With seine net trawl for porpoise in lagoons;

While scullions gauge erratic escapades

   Of madrepores in water-logged galloons.

Flamboyant triptychs groined with gherkins green,

    In reckless fracas with coquettish bream,

Ecstatic gargoyles, with grotesque chagrin,

    Garnish the gruesome nightmare of my dream!

Off to your dictionary, then, dear reader....

* Source: The Best, Worst & Most Unusual, by Bruce Felton & Mark Fowler, Galahad Books, New York, 1994.