Spaghetti

For several years, a man had been having an affair with an Italian woman. One night, she confided to him that she was pregnant.

Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go back to Italy to secretly have the child. Also, if she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would provide child support until the child turned 18.

She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a postcard, and write “Spaghetti” on the back when the child was born. He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin.

One day, about eight months later, he came home to his confused wife.
“Honey,” she said, “You received a very strange postcard today.”
“Oh, just give it to me and I’ll explain it later,” he replied.

The wife obeyed and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.
On the card was written:

Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti.
Three with meatballs, two without.
Send extra sauce.

Thanks to the elusive (and non-Italian) Agent 1.